Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-23

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.

Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Whether a significant proportion of youngsters is beneficial for society or not has been the topic of debate for the past few decades. Some people believe, Only the older generation benefits the country in times of need. However, many are of the opinion that youngsters are more energetic, charismatic and enthusiastic. Hence, the growing population of young individuals is always better than growing numbers of old citizens. This essay will discuss both advantages and disadvantages of large number of young adults.

The presence of determined and well-rounded adolescents is extremely essential for the progress of any nation.These individuals have intellectual mindset s that may be be utilized to benefit the economy of a country. Youngsters, because of their good health, may serve their nation by joining various national companies. In contrast to the old people, who are vulnerable and require more assistance from the government.

Most of the hiring companies, regardless of their domain, prefer recruiting young talent because they bring immense productivity to the work.There is a substantial difference between the tendancies of young and old individuals. A young employee may work under pressure without compromising his health whereas an older worker might faint or feel weak due to excessive workload.

In my opinion, the advantages definetly outweigh the disadvantages. Having a large number of young men and women may lead to enormous improvement in operational performance across various sectors such as energy or education. However, that does not mean that older people are not needed in society. They are still valued and respected because of the services they once provided to their country but this fact cannot be negated that their scarcity will not effect society as much as the scarcity of youngsters.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.0
Coherence and Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource6.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy6.0
Overall6.0

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses the prompt by discussing both advantages and disadvantages, culminating in a clear personal position that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. However, some ideas are slightly under-developed or broad. For instance, the second paragraph mentions that youngsters 'may be utilized to benefit the economy' and 'serve their nation by joining various national companies,' but these points lack specific examples or deeper extension. The contrast with older people is introduced well, though the reasoning relies heavily on generalisations rather than well-supported analysis. Nonetheless, all parts of the task are addressed and a consistent perspective is maintained throughout, fitting the Band 6 descriptor well.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The essay presents a coherent overall arrangement with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate distinct points, such as economic contributions and productivity in the workplace. However, cohesion at times feels mechanical or faulty. For example, the sentence fragment 'These individuals have intellectual mindset s that may be be utilized...' disrupts the logical flow, and referencing between sentences occasionally lacks smooth transitions (e.g., 'In contrast to the old people, who are vulnerable...'). Cohesive devices are present but can be rigid. Overall, the structural progression is clear enough to earn a Band 6.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting some less common items such as 'charismatic,' 'vulnerable,' and 'operational performance.' However, there are several lexical errors and awkward word choices, such as 'tendancies' (tendencies), 'intellectual mindset s,' and the phrase 'this fact cannot be negated that their scarcity will not effect society.' Additionally, basic spelling slips like 'definetly' and typographical issues like spacing ('mindset s') detract from precision. While communication is not impeded, these inaccuracies prevent the lexical score from reaching a higher band.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating some control over multi-clause structures (e.g., 'Whether a significant proportion of youngsters is beneficial...'). However, there are frequent grammatical errors and punctuation slips throughout the text. Notable issues include sentence fragments and awkward structures, such as 'Some people believe, Only the older generation benefits...' and '...that may be be utilized.' There is also a punctuation and capitalization error at the start of a sentence ('These individuals...'). While these errors do not completely obscure meaning, they occur regularly enough to cap the score at Band 6.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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