Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-25

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.

Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In this contemporary era, severel nations includes more young adults compared to older people. The advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages. In the forthcoming paragraphs i have supported my stand with reasonable justifications.

Taking into some advantages of this trend, is that younger people are more energetic and capable to do anything easily compared to

older once. We can always see that at every employment place there are mostly young people are working. They are strong by their body so they can work easily and confidently without feeling low for long hours. Such as if a person is working at the any office and he ore she have to work whole day by standing or always have to travel for their work , it become very difficult for an older people .

In addition, younger people are can develop economy. If there is a large number of young adults , they can develop higher productivity by their newly and trendy ideas. Such as if any younger people use AI for their presentation or for thier product , it can more intresting and attractive. And this can help to make high growth in business. If that product is selected and loved by the consumers , it can be a very beneficial thing for that company and that person also. This can also develop the economy of the company and of the contry also . And by this many other young people can also get inspired and do another things such like that and also improve the economy of the nation.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

The response addresses the prompt by discussing the advantages of having a large population of young adults compared to older people, taking a clear position that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited and repetitive. The writer mentions physical stamina in the workplace and economic development through innovation, but these points are supported with basic, general examples rather than fully extended arguments. The conclusion is also missing, as the essay stops abruptly after the second body paragraph. This places the response comfortably at Band 5.0, where the task is addressed, but ideas remain under-developed and the position is not brought to a full conclusion.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The essay displays some basic organization, using introductory and transitional markers such as 'In this contemporary era', 'Taking into some advantages', and 'In addition'. However, paragraphing is problematic; the introduction is fragmented across multiple very short lines, and the overall progression lacks a clear concluding paragraph. Cohesive devices are sometimes used inaccurately, such as 'Taking into some advantages of this trend, is that...', which disrupts the flow. Referencing is also occasionally unclear. This level of organisation aligns with Band 5.0, where there is some overall structure and logical intent, but cohesion is faulty and mechanical.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The student uses a basic and repetitive vocabulary range with noticeable errors in word choice and spelling throughout the text. Examples of lexical errors include 'severel' instead of several, 'employment place' instead of workplace, 'older once' instead of older ones, 'intresting' instead of interesting, and 'contry' instead of country. While the writer attempts some less common vocabulary such as 'productivity' and 'innovative' (implied by trendy ideas), the high frequency of spelling and collocation errors limits the lexical score to Band 5.0, where the vocabulary is minimally adequate for the task but contains noticeable errors that cause some difficulty for the reader.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The essay exhibits a very limited range of grammatical structures, relying heavily on simple sentences and prone to frequent errors when attempting complex formations. Frequent mistakes include subject-verb agreement issues like 'severel nations includes', pronoun errors like 'he ore she have', and awkward phrasing such as 'younger people are can develop economy'. Punctuation and capitalization are also erratic, notably with the lowercase 'i'. Because simple sentences dominate and frequent errors cause strain for the reader without completely obscuring the core message, this performance meets the criteria for Band 5.0.

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