Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-28

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.

Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In recent time, few countries have large number of youngsters as compared to the older one. I believe that this is a positive trend and it has various benefits of having more number of young people as they can contribute to the economy of the country and can provide greater benefits by providing traits such as work-efficiency, enthusiasm and progressive mind-set.

The biggest advantage of having young citizens is that they can work more efficiently and for longer hours without taking leaves ,because they are at the beginning of their career and they want to achieve specific goals. As a result, they produce greater results. Futhermore, they are more energetic and are ready to experiment, which enables them to bring new ideas and implement it for the betterment of the organisation. They are more likely to work and can pay higher taxes from their earning. For instance, many countries pursuade their citizens to give birth to children as they can contribute significantly in the develpment of their nation by paying taxes.

In contrast, Older people are mostly retired and become burden on governments. They are likely to survive on the benefits provided by the government. They may not work that efficiently because of health issues and requires breaks from the work regularly. Moreover, their ideas become outdated and it may get difficult for them to cope-up with fast paced life. However, such profession may require the expertise of aged people but, overall they do not bring much advantages.

Taking everything into consideration, merits of having larger younger population clealy outweigh the disadvantages of it.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

The response addresses all parts of the task by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of having a large proportion of young adults compared to older people, and a clear position is stated in the introduction and reinforced in the conclusion. The ideas are generally relevant, such as work efficiency, tax contributions, and the burden of an aging population on government resources. However, some arguments lack full extension and deep supporting evidence. For instance, the point about older people becoming a burden is somewhat generalised and could benefit from further elaboration. Overall, the task is addressed adequately, fitting the criteria for Band 6.5, which is rounded to 6.0 based on standard whole or half-band increments.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response is organised into clear paragraphs, each with a discernible focus, moving from an introduction to the main advantages, disadvantages, and finally a conclusion. Cohesive devices such as 'Furthermore', 'In contrast', and 'Taking everything into consideration' are used to structure the text logically. However, referencing and transitions are at times slightly mechanical. For example, the sentence 'Moreover, their ideas become outdated...' follows abruptly, and some pronoun references lack precision. Paragraphing is used sufficiently, providing a coherent overall arrangement that satisfies the requirements for a Band 6.0.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting less common phrases such as 'work-efficiency', 'progressive mind-set', and 'fast paced life'. However, there are noticeable lexical errors and awkward collocations throughout the text, such as 'In recent time' instead of 'In recent times', 'few countries have large number' omitting plural articles, and 'become burden' instead of 'become a burden'. Additionally, spelling and word form errors occur, such as 'Futhermore', 'pursuade', 'develpment', and 'cop-up'. These errors do not impede communication, but they restrict the lexical score to a Band 5.5.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, including relative clauses and conditional structures. However, grammatical errors are frequent throughout the response, particularly with articles, pluralisation, and subject-verb agreement. Examples include 'large number of youngsters as compared to the older one', 'implement it' where 'it' lacks a clear singular antecedent, and 'requires breaks' where the subject is plural. Punctuation errors are also present, such as unnecessary comma splices and spacing issues. While these errors rarely impede overall communication, they prevent the grammar score from reaching a higher band, placing it firmly at Band 5.5.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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