Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-02

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.

Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Currently, the number of people in some countries consist of a large proportion of young adults as compared to older people. I believe the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages.

Youth represents the future of a country. A territory with a higher number of young adults represents a larger proportion of work force. This has several advantages. For example; India is the country with the highest number of working professionals which is one of the major reasons behind its growing gdp. The current situation puts India at an advantage over countries with a low number of young adults.

On the other hand, a country with a high ratio of older people might higher number of experienced people however, this could be a significant disadvantage when it comes to the average age of a country. This state is one of the key determinants of growth. Japan is a country with a high number of aged people because of a single child policy they had established a couple of decades back to control the population. While this population helped the country maintain the number of its citizens it also led to Japan as a country having an average age higher than most other countries. The consequence of this was a decline in the number of working professionals available in the country. Companies had to hire employees from across the world leading to outflow of the country's currency.

Leading to a reductio

In conclusion, the reasons mentioned above are why I believe a large number of young adults compared with the number of older people has more advantages and hence outweighs the disadvantages.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the task and presents a clear position throughout, concluding that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. Relevant ideas are introduced, such as the economic benefits of a large workforce exemplified by India and the challenges faced by aging populations like Japan. However, some ideas remain under-developed or lack full extension. For instance, the discussion on Japan touches on the single-child policy and workforce shortages, but the explanation regarding currency outflow lacks complete elaboration. To reach a higher level, the arguments could be supported with deeper analysis and more fully explored examples rather than generalizing some points.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The essay presents a coherent overall arrangement with a clear stance established in the introduction and reinforced in the conclusion. Paragraphing is used appropriately to divide introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. However, cohesion within and between sentences is sometimes mechanical or abrupt, such as the sudden transition in the second paragraph with 'For example; India is the country...' where punctuation is misused. Referencing and logical progression occasionally falter, and the essay abruptly trails off into an unfinished fragment at the end of the third body paragraph ('Leading to a reductio'). Better management of cohesive devices and smoother transitions would elevate this aspect.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

The vocabulary used is generally adequate for the task, successfully communicating the main ideas. The writer attempts some less common vocabulary and context-specific terms, such as 'work force', 'working professionals', and 'aging people', though some word choices and collocations lack precision or contain minor errors, such as 'consist of' instead of 'consists of' and 'might higher number' instead of 'might have a higher number'. Spelling is generally accurate, and errors do not impede communication. To achieve a higher band, a wider and more flexible range of less common lexical items and idiomatic phrases should be employed with greater precision and stylistic awareness.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The response demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, utilizing structures like relative clauses and conditional-style comparisons. There are some noticeable errors in grammar and punctuation, including subject-verb agreement issues ('the number of people... consist of'), missing verbs ('might higher number'), incorrect semicolon usage ('For example; India'), and punctuation errors that culminate in an incomplete sentence fragment near the end. Despite these errors, they rarely impede communication, placing the grammatical control squarely at this level. To improve, the writer needs to increase the proportion of error-free complex sentences and ensure rigorous proofreading of verb forms and articles.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.