Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-03
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.
Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
In today's world, it is commonly seen that the number of youth exceeds the population of senior citizens in numerous countries. In my perspective, this situation have various advantages than disadvantages as the youth as a majority population opens a door for the development of a nation and will have pension seeking population in minority.
The population of youth in majority have a number of advantages as it provides various opportunity and will contribite to the development of a nation. To illustrate, it is coomonly seen in countries like India, china the population of youth is in majority as compared to the older generation is growing at its full pace because this group people can do work for much longer time as compared to other group and will contribute to the nation's economy by paying taxes in time. Therefore, having younger generation of a nation im majority has numerous benefits than having older generation as it would have contribute in a nation's economic growth.
On the other hand, it is also observed that having older generation in majority have its own disadvantages, which are too hard to ignore, because this group of individual is dependent group and seeks pension from the government. For illustration, in nations like Japan, South Korea where the population of dependent group is in majority and independent in minority causing a huge economic issue.The government have to pay them pension, while the youth of a nation pays taxes and supports a nation's economic growth. Thus, the older generation as a majority group has various disadvantages by seeking for pension, while the younger generation provide various benefits in a nation's economy.
To conclude, having youth as major population has various advantages for a nation than having older generation in majority.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
The response addresses all parts of the task by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of a youth-heavy population and clearly states a position in the introduction. However, the development of ideas is uneven. While the second and third paragraphs provide relevant examples such as India, China, Japan, and South Korea, some supporting points remain repetitive and under-developed. For instance, the discussion on economic growth and pension burdens is reiterated rather than extended with deeper analysis. To reach the next level, the student needs to fully develop all main ideas with more precise explanations and avoid circular reasoning.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5
The essay demonstrates a coherent overall arrangement with a clear, logical progression of ideas from the introduction through the body paragraphs to the conclusion. Paragraphing is used sufficiently, with each body paragraph focusing on a distinct side of the argument. Cohesive devices such as 'To illustrate', 'On the other hand', and 'Thus' are employed to guide the reader, although some referencing and transitional links feel slightly mechanical and repetitive. The half-band achievement reflects a clear logical flow that meets the lower band requirements while beginning to show effective structural organisation, though more varied and subtle cohesive phrasing is needed for a higher score.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, allowing the writer to communicate main ideas about demographics and economics. There are several attempts to use less common items and subject-specific vocabulary, such as 'senior citizens', 'pension seeking population', and 'independent in minority'. However, there are noticeable errors in word choice and collocation, including phrases like 'this situation have various advantages than disadvantages' and 'contribite', along with spelling slips such as 'coomonly'. These lexical inaccuracies do not seriously impede communication, placing the response firmly in the middle band for resource, where vocabulary is sufficient for the task but lacks precision and natural control.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
The writing exhibits a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating that the student can attempt varied structures. However, there are persistent errors in grammar and punctuation throughout the text. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues like 'this situation have' and 'generation... is', article omissions such as 'in majority', and awkward phrasing within grammatical patterns like 'having younger generation of a nation im majority'. Despite these errors, the sentence structures are mostly clear and rarely impede the reader's understanding. To improve further, the student needs to exercise tighter control over basic agreements, articles, and prepositions within complex sentences.
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