Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.

Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is undeniable that if the youngones are the backbone of the nation, it deems that elder ones are the roots of country. In this regards, nowadays, fewer nations believe that youth play important role in the development of county instead of grey-haired people. In this eassy i will disscussed the pros outweigh the cons with conclusion.

To commence with, there are multifarious postive points of having a more young people. The pridoment is that physically well. to justify it, they have more flexibility and good well-being to do heavy work. they can do any kind of work easily and quickly. For example; youngsters can carry a weight and run here to there for perfoming any task which cannot be done by the elder people. So, the young generation can act as boon for progress of any workplace or nation. Secondly, young adults have sharp memory. To explain it, they can remember any kind of appoinment, work and they have more ideas to built the poweful project. By dint of this, companies can grow more as they need active employees which they are.

Moreover, young generation have much knowlege about technical devices as compare to older ones. the first and foremost thing is that they are automation users person who are connected with technology. To eleborate it, by the experience of technical gagets youngones easily complete their work just in a one click which cannot be done by oldies as they do not have much information to oprate it. As a result, compnies can touch to the top of progress by the youth. However, the older people have the own place in this society for growing it as they inculcate the moral values into youngones and share their life experience with them which makes them a good citizen. Due to this, elderones play vitial role in the coutry.

To conclude, although the older people are the most important part of nation but according to me nation need more youngones to grow because of their physical and mental strength.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the task by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of having a young population, ultimately taking a clear position that the advantages outweigh the downsides. Relevant ideas are presented, such as physical strength, technical proficiency, and the complementary role of older generations in teaching moral values. However, some ideas are under-developed or lack extension. For instance, the point about young people having sharp memory and building powerful projects is introduced with limited elaboration, relying on general assertions rather than specific examples. To move to a higher level, the writer needs to extend these arguments more fully with deeper explanations and concrete illustrations throughout the body paragraphs.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The essay presents a coherent overall arrangement with a clear introduction and conclusion, and the writing is divided into distinct paragraphs. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical or faulty, and referencing is not always clear. Phrases like 'To commence with,' 'To explain it,' and 'To eleborate it' are used repetitively as transitional markers, making the progression feel formulaic. Furthermore, some sentences lack smooth links, such as abruptly shifting between ideas without adequate conjunctions, and pronoun referencing (like 'they are automation users person who are connected with technology') can be confusing. Achieving a higher band requires more flexible, natural cohesive devices and clearer logical progression between sentences and paragraphs.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The writer demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting less common items such as 'multifarious,' 'pridoment' (predominant), and 'inculcate.' However, there are numerous noticeable errors in word choice, spelling, and word form, such as 'youngones' instead of youngsters, 'eassy' instead of essay, 'disscussed' instead of discussed, 'postive' instead of positive, 'appoinment' instead of appointment, 'knowlege' instead of knowledge, 'gagets' instead of gadgets, and 'oprate' instead of operate. While communication is generally maintained despite these flaws, the high frequency of lexical inaccuracies prevents the response from achieving a higher rating. To improve, the writer should focus on accurate spelling, precise word forms, and natural collocations.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The essay displays a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, attempting multi-clause structures such as 'although the older people are the most important part of nation but according to me nation need more youngones...' However, there are frequent errors in grammar and punctuation that can cause some difficulty for the reader. These include issues with articles ('the youngones,' 'the roots of country'), subject-verb agreement ('it deems that elder ones are,' 'nation need'), and prepositions or grammatical patterns ('compnies can touch to the top'). Furthermore, punctuation is sometimes faulty, such as incorrect semicolon usage ('For example; youngsters can'). To reach a higher standard, the writer must exercise better control over complex sentence structures and reduce basic grammatical slips.

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