Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-09

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.

Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Mostly the developed nations have the larger number of younger adults whereas countries which are underdeveloped mostly have older people since many go abroad for in search of better oppourniticity. From this factor the stating of many young can be seen for some countries than another countries. With this it has mainy various advantages which outweighting its disadvantages.

Firstly, for better career and lifestyle many young prefer going to the different nation as either international student or in working making them as key aspect of economy of the nation as the working force to handle it. Usually, they move to natios which are better for them so that they can uplift their life into the modern thinhgs rather than into traditional works. For instances we can take student who go for international studies in different nation such as USA, UK, Canada, and so on for learning and gaining experience. With so much youth mindset at place there are rarely older people who are there as aged ones seek and shift towrads more peaceful environment than into hustling city.

However, without the helping hand from the young, the places such as underdeveloped nation may lack skilled and well trained human resources as many go into different nations for oppournity.Older aged may not get care and support during this period of life as most of there are almost older ones in all the places. For example: Many houses in the rural areas from countries such as Nepal, which is underdeveloped nation have older people staying as most of the youngster have left the village for in search of better career development into the cities places. So, the places have more number of older people than younger ones for these places.

In conclusion, from better lifestyle, oppournity, workoforce many young people pay back the amount to their nation uplifting the living standard also for the older ones. From the various success, mindset, emotional connection with the elder ones brings postive for bith the aspect in current generation.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You attempt to answer the question by presenting benefits, such as young adults contributing to the workforce, and drawbacks, including a shortage of skilled workers and reduced support for older people. However, the response does not consistently address the stated situation: it often shifts to young people migrating from poorer countries, rather than considering countries whose populations already contain relatively more young adults. Your position that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages is suggested in the introduction and conclusion, but the reasoning is not fully clear; for example, the claim that young people “pay back the amount to their nation” is not explained. Develop a direct comparison of the advantages and disadvantages and support each point with clearer, relevant examples.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has a recognisable introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion, and “Firstly” and “However” signal a change in direction. These features give the reader some sense of organisation. However, the overall progression is difficult to follow because the discussion moves between population age structure, migration, international study and rural depopulation without clearly connecting them to the question. Some links are also unclear: “From this factor” does not identify the factor precisely, and the final sentence introduces “success” and “emotional connection” without developing those ideas. Use each paragraph to develop one clearly stated point, and make the relationship between examples and the main argument explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “working force,” “skilled and well trained human resources,” “living standard” and “peaceful environment.” However, the range is limited by repeated general words such as “young,” “nation” and “better,” while several inaccurate word choices or spellings make meaning harder to follow. Examples include “oppourniticity,” “thinhgs,” “workoforce” and “postive”; “uplift their life into the modern things” is also an unclear collocation. Aim for precise terms such as “young workforce,” “employment prospects” and “older residents,” and check spelling and natural word combinations. This would make your ideas easier to understand and more appropriate to an academic essay.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You try to use both simple and longer sentences, including clauses beginning with “whereas,” “since” and “as.” However, complex sentences are often faulty, and frequent errors in sentence structure, agreement, articles and verb forms sometimes make the meaning difficult to follow. For example, “the stating of many young can be seen” has an unclear grammatical structure, while “many young prefer going” needs a noun such as “young people.” In “most of there are almost older ones,” the pronoun and sentence construction are also unclear. Practise building accurate subject–verb–object sentences first, then add subordinate clauses. Check articles, plural forms and punctuation when editing.

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