Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.

Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is widespread that, in certain countries the number of senior citizen are lower than number of adlocentes. Yes the merits of this condition outweigh the disadvantages due to ecnomical and responsibility perspectives.

To begins with, the youngesters play a significant role in the development of a country as compared to old people. Although, old persons have more practical experinece than young people, but they have less energy to do work. Alternatively, the young individuals have more energy and new skills to contribute a countrys development. For instance, in todays digital era, youngesters are fimilar by skills regarding IT and new techniques to tackel a challenge. By using their skills, they can make a crucial contibution in a country ecomical condition. Consequently, the country will grow rapidly and impose beneficial impacts on the inhabitants.

Another matter of fact, is the youngesters can participate more efficiently in any disasters. They will actively participate in volunter scheme and will assist people to reduce their worrirs. For example, if a country face a situtaion of drought or flood than the young people have more active than old people. Due to the physical fitness the young individuals will more active to solve the problems and help the needy people. This behavious will make them responsible. As the result, a responsible person are the gems for a country.

In conclusion, Although, the old people are more experience and mature, but they are not fimiliar from the new technologies. The young people make a country stronger in ecnomical growth and, with their responsible behaviour.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You give a clear answer that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages, and both body paragraphs support this position with relevant points: young adults can contribute skills to economic development and help during disasters. The examples about digital skills and responding to floods or droughts make the discussion more specific. You also acknowledge older people’s experience in the introduction and conclusion. However, the comparison with older people is not developed consistently, and some claims—such as young people making a country “grow rapidly”—need clearer explanation or a more concrete example. The disaster paragraph explains the benefit but does not fully connect it to the overall balance of advantages and disadvantages. Develop each main point with a clearer cause-and-effect explanation and a more explicit comparison.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs presenting separate advantages, and a conclusion that restates your position. Sequencing within the paragraphs is generally understandable, and examples follow the points they illustrate. However, some linking is mechanical or awkward, as in “To begins with,” “Another matter of fact,” and “As the result.” The conclusion also introduces the idea of older people’s unfamiliarity with technology without developing it earlier, and its final sentence does not clearly complete the argument. Use simpler, accurate transitions and make sure each paragraph develops one connected point. A conclusion that briefly weighs the advantages against the disadvantages would create a stronger sense of progression.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt topic-relevant vocabulary, including “practical experience,” “digital era,” “contribute,” “disasters,” and “physical fitness.” These choices help communicate the main ideas, but the range is limited and several spelling and word-choice errors make the writing less clear or natural. Examples include “adlocentes,” “ecnonomical,” “fimilar,” and “worrirs”; phrases such as “make a crucial contribution in a country economical condition” also show inaccurate collocation and word form. Some expressions, including “the gems for a country,” are informal or unclear for this essay. Build accuracy by checking spelling and learning common combinations such as “contribute to economic growth” and “provide assistance during disasters.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You use both simple sentences and attempts at more complex structures, including “Although old persons have more practical experience…” and the conditional example beginning “if a country face…”. The main ideas are usually understandable, but errors in agreement, verb forms, articles, and sentence construction occur across the response. For example, “the number of senior citizen are lower” has problems with number agreement and plural form, while “a country face” and “a responsible person are” also show agreement errors. The opening “To begins with” and the final sentence are not grammatically complete or well controlled. Practise accurate subject–verb agreement and build complex sentences from clear clauses; this will let you express comparisons and consequences more reliably.

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