Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.

Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Nowadays, in few conturies younger generation groups are in more demand compared to older people. Some think having youngester is benificial to the soceity, whereas there are disadvantages for increase in few areas.

On one hand, the in western conturies young peoples are wanted for the popularity of the market. In some co-oprate jobs employer ask for young age individuals to apply, jobs that works with new technology preffer their assigments or project to be done sooner and training is giving with limited timeout. For example, adults can be trainied in few time as they already have knowledge with the AI technology and systems on the computers. Henceforth, bussiness run smoothly without any delay and youngerster can work faster then older people.

On the other hand, older generation have more experince and their seniority increase. Due to it the company should increased their salaries, which is not adjustable with the todays world of expensense. For example, if a particular company have managers with older age and more experince will be needed to promote to CEO. In the company their are few

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You address the topic by presenting a possible benefit of a younger population—its contribution to businesses using new technology—and a possible drawback involving older workers’ experience and salary costs. However, the response does not clearly answer whether the advantages outweigh the disadvantages, and the position is not sustained. The examples about training and promotion are difficult to interpret and are not developed enough to support a comparison. The response also ends mid-sentence (“In the company their are few”), leaving the argument incomplete. It is 69 words below the required minimum, which limits the opportunity to explain your reasons and include relevant examples. State your overall judgement clearly, then develop each side with specific, logically explained evidence.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is a basic attempt to organise the response: an introduction is followed by paragraphs beginning “On one hand” and “On the other hand.” This gives the reader a broad sense of the two sides being discussed. However, progression within the paragraphs is difficult to follow, particularly where the discussion moves from technology and training to business performance. The final paragraph stops abruptly, and the conclusion is missing, so the response has no clear overall resolution. Some linking expressions, such as “Henceforth,” do not clearly show the relationship between the ideas. Use one main point per paragraph, explain how each example supports it, and finish with a short conclusion that directly answers the question.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You attempt vocabulary relevant to employment and society, including “seniority,” “promote to CEO,” “technology,” and “experience.” These choices show an effort to discuss the topic beyond very basic terms. However, spelling errors and inaccurate word forms are frequent, including “conturies,” “benificial,” “soceity,” and “experince,” and several phrases are unnatural or unclear, such as “young generation groups are in more demand” and “limited timeout.” These errors make parts of the argument harder to understand. Build accuracy by checking spelling and learning common collocations as complete phrases—for example, “young workers are in demand” and “receive training within a short period”—rather than translating word by word.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You use some simple sentences and attempt longer structures, including a conditional example beginning “if a particular company…” and a clause introduced by “whereas.” This shows some willingness to vary sentence forms. However, control is inconsistent, especially with subject–verb agreement, articles, plurals, and verb forms. Examples include “employer ask,” “jobs that works,” “a particular company have,” and “the company should increased.” The final sentence is incomplete, and some sentence boundaries make the relationships between ideas unclear. Practise checking each sentence for a clear subject and finite verb, then confirm that the verb agrees with its subject and has the correct form. Shorter, complete sentences would help you communicate your ideas more reliably.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.