Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-13

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.

Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is commonly belived that in the population of a few nations, at the present time, the numbers of older indivisuals are less as compare to the young people. In this essay i will discuss whether the advantages of this situation outweight the disadvantages.

To began with the advanteges, firstly, more younger people means more productivity and boosted economy. For example, younger people can work more

than older people which increase the income and make the finacial condition better. As compere to older people, younger induivisuals have good health which help them to do every kind of work and also for long time. Youngsters have more stamina then older people and they can earn more by doing multiple jobs. Secondly, young adults are reliable with technology. For example, adults studying on different feilds and gain knowledge about technology along with other businesses which help them to get good jobs and higher saleries.

Moreover, older people do not know more about technology and face many problems when they try to operate technology related things. Additionally, older people also have many health issues and the treatment of that health issues take huge amout of money. However, it also have some disadvantages such as traditional thoughts and experience of life. For example, older people help youngers to know about their tradition which older people learnt from their perents or grandperents. Along with that, older people also have much experience of life and they know how to deal with worse situation in life.

In conclusion, although, old people have more life experience and provide right guidance to the youngsters, having young adults in country can boost the economy and productivity and more progress can be made by developing new technologies,

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both sides of the question and make your overall view clear: a younger population is beneficial because it can increase productivity, strengthen the economy and support technological progress, despite older people offering experience and guidance. These are relevant points, but several are asserted rather than explained. For instance, the claim that young people can do “multiple jobs” does not show how this benefits society overall, and the technology point would be stronger with a specific example. The disadvantages are also treated briefly, mainly as older people’s traditional views and experience, without weighing their wider effects. Develop fewer ideas with clearer reasoning and examples, and state more explicitly why the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, discussion of advantages, a paragraph that includes disadvantages, and a conclusion. Sequencing words such as “To begin with,” “Firstly,” “Secondly,” “Moreover,” and “In conclusion” help signal the direction of the argument. However, progression is not always clear: “Moreover” introduces another disadvantage after the advantages, while “However” then shifts to the benefits older people provide. The conclusion also ends abruptly, and the final sentence is not fully punctuated. Group the advantages and disadvantages into clearly focused paragraphs, use transitions that accurately show the relationship between ideas, and make the comparison between them more explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “productivity,” “economy,” “technology,” “traditional thoughts,” and “experience of life.” This gives you enough language to communicate the main argument. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, sometimes making the meaning less natural: “good health” is used as a broad comparison, “reliable with technology” does not express the intended idea, and “worse situation” is imprecise. Spelling errors such as “belived,” “indivisuals,” “finacial,” and “saleries” are also noticeable. Build a more accurate set of phrases for discussing employment, demographic change and social contributions, and proofread spelling and word forms.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more extended sentences, including examples introduced with “For example” and a contrast beginning “although.” However, the range is limited, and errors occur frequently in basic sentence patterns as well as in longer clauses. Examples include “which increase the income,” where the verb does not agree with its subject, “which help them,” and “it also have,” which also has an agreement error. The opening phrase “To began with” uses the wrong verb form, and the conclusion’s “although” clause is not punctuated or connected cleanly to the main clause. Practise subject–verb agreement, verb forms and complete sentence boundaries, then check each sentence for a clear subject and main verb.

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