Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-13

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.

Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Nowadays, it is clearly noticeable that young adults occupy the highest frequency in some countries. I see that this fact should bring positive impact for nations and in this essay I will state the reasons for my opinion.

First and foremost, young people are healthier and have more energy for giving the best to the futur generations.They will be able to study , to learn and create new concepts and theories which will consequently improve the education system, the work environment and lead to more developments and unexpected breakthroughs.For example, young group of Algerian IT-students have recently won the Grand prize in china for improving the network of huawei ICT.

Regading disadvantages, spoiled and uneducated adults may negatively influence other people from the same age in terms of consuming drugs, spreading antisocial crimes and spreading harmful acts. Furthermore, population will suffer from corruption and insecurity. For example in USA, many people struggle with the

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You state a clear overall view—“this fact should bring positive impact”—and give a relevant benefit: young adults may contribute to education, work and innovation. The Algerian students’ technology example also attempts to support this point. However, the response addresses the question only partially: the advantages are not weighed against the disadvantages, and the disadvantage paragraph lists risks without explaining how likely or significant they are. The final example, “many people struggle with the”, is unfinished, leaving the point unclear. The response is also 96 words below the required minimum, which substantially limits the development of your reasons and examples. To strengthen the answer, explain why the benefits outweigh the costs, develop both sides, and complete the essay with a conclusion that restates your judgement.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a basic, recognisable structure: an introduction, a paragraph beginning “First and foremost” and a contrasting paragraph introduced by “Regading disadvantages.” These markers help the reader identify the shift from benefits to drawbacks. However, the progression is limited because each point is presented briefly, with little explanation linking the claims to the overall judgement. The second paragraph ends abruptly, so the essay has no completed conclusion and the argument does not reach a clear endpoint. Some linking is also mechanical, particularly the repeated use of “and” to join several outcomes. Build each body paragraph around one main idea, explain its consequences, and use a concluding paragraph to compare the two sides and confirm your position.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You attempt some topic-related vocabulary, including “breakthroughs,” “education system,” “work environment,” “corruption” and “insecurity.” These choices show an effort to discuss social and economic effects rather than relying only on basic language. However, several word choices or collocations are inaccurate or unclear, such as “highest frequency” for the proportion of young adults and “giving the best to the futur generations.” “Spoiled and uneducated adults” is also a broad, potentially imprecise description, while “spreading” is repeated in the list of disadvantages. Spelling errors such as “Regading” and “futur” further reduce accuracy. Aim for precise demographic and social vocabulary, check spelling, and vary repeated verbs while keeping claims appropriately specific.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You use both simple statements and some longer structures, including “They will be able to study, to learn and create new concepts and theories which will consequently improve…” This shows an attempt to connect ideas through clauses and coordinated verbs. However, errors in sentence boundaries and punctuation make parts harder to read: there are missing spaces after full stops, and the final sentence is incomplete (“many people struggle with the”). There are also problems with articles and number, as in “young group of Algerian IT-students,” and the opening phrase “the highest frequency” does not form a natural grammatical expression for this meaning. Review sentence completion, article use and punctuation, and proofread spacing. More accurate control of these patterns would make your ideas easier to follow.

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