Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-15

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.

Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Nowadays, some countries have a larger number of young adults than older people. This situation has both advantages and disadvantages. However i believe that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.

On the one hand, having more young people has many benefits. Young adults are energetic, active, and willing to learn new skills. They can work in different industries and help the country develop. For example, young people can work in hospitals, schools, offices, and factories. They can also use modern technology easily and bring new ideas to their workplaces. Moreover, young workers can help improved the economy by paying taxes and starting new businesses. On the other hand there are some disadvantages. A large young population can create more competition for jobs. If the government cannot provide enough employment opportunities, many young people may remain unemployed. This can lead to poverty and stress. In addition, young adults need good education, healthcare, and training facilities. Providing these services for a large population can be expensive for the government.

In my opinion the advantages are greater because young people are an important resource for every country. If they receive a good education and suitable job opportunities, they can contribute to national development. For example, in India, many young people work in different sectors and support economic growth. The government should invest in education and training to help them build successful careers.

In conclusion, although having more young adults can cause unemployment and increase pressure on public services, I believe the

advantages outweigh the disadvantages because young people can help a country become more successful and developed.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You address both sides of the question and state a clear view in the introduction and conclusion: the benefits of a young population outweigh its drawbacks. Relevant support includes young adults contributing through work, taxes and business creation, alongside concerns about unemployment and pressure on public services. The India example also helps make your position concrete. However, some points are asserted rather than fully explained: for instance, the list of workplaces does not show specifically how a larger young workforce benefits the country, and the India example remains general. To strengthen the response, develop one or two examples with a clearer cause-and-effect explanation, and explain why the benefits outweigh the costs rather than mainly restating your position.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a coherent overall arrangement: an introduction, a paragraph presenting advantages and disadvantages, a paragraph explaining your view, and a conclusion. Signposting such as “On the one hand,” “On the other hand,” and “In conclusion” makes the direction easy to follow. The main limitation is that the advantages and disadvantages are combined in one paragraph, so the shift between them feels somewhat abrupt; “Moreover” also introduces another benefit before the contrast begins. Some links are mechanical, and the final paragraph largely repeats the position already stated. Use separate, clearly focused paragraphs for the two sides, and connect each supporting example directly to the claim it illustrates. This would make progression more deliberate and cohesion less dependent on formulaic transitions.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

Your vocabulary is adequate for discussing population, employment and public services, with relevant phrases such as “employment opportunities,” “economic growth,” and “national development.” These choices communicate the main ideas clearly. However, much of the wording is common and repeated, including “young people,” “young adults,” “help,” and “country.” There are also a few imprecise or awkward choices, such as “help improved the economy,” where the word form and phrasing are not natural, and “more competition for jobs,” which could be expressed more precisely as increased competition in the labour market. Broaden your range with accurate topic-specific collocations and vary repeated terms, while checking that less familiar expressions fit their grammatical context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, including conditional structures such as “If the government cannot provide enough employment opportunities, many young people may remain unemployed” and a subordinate clause beginning “although” in the conclusion. Most sentences are clear, and errors rarely interfere with meaning. Some grammatical and punctuation slips remain: “However i believe” needs a capital letter and comma, “On the other hand there” needs a comma after the introductory phrase, and “help improved” has an incorrect verb form; use “help improve.” The conclusion also has an unnecessary line break within the sentence. To improve control, proofread sentence openings and verb patterns, and practise using a wider range of complex structures accurately rather than relying mainly on straightforward statements.

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