Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-16

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.

Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The population youth has become a large number in many countries in compare to senior citizens. Many people feel that it will create various difficult issues. Although it might have some drawbacks, I strongly believe that significance of this situations outweigh the shortcomings.

At the one hand, In many developed and developing countries, a substantial amount of assest and money is allocated to promote the importance of young population. The main reason behind it is the hard work because young people can utilize their time more acurately and with passion. A recent study conducted by the WHO where they found that the young people can work 14 to 15 hours without a break and rest. At the same time it creates many positive doors for many companies and for the national economies as well. Therefore, young brains are more innovative and faster than older people. Most of the tach companies and social media platfroms are also running by the young people.

On the other hand, many would agree that contemporary siciety has nearly transcended its traditional boundaries with help of experienced minds and individuals. Moreover, older people are considered as assests in many countraies because they have the experience and sufficient knowledge of problem solving and situation handling. For example, two groups of people combanation of young and old leader formed to handle the after flood situations. Surprisigingly, old people mange the workload and stress more comfortably than young. Nevertheless, under certain circumstances, many countries not promoting citizen due to their mental and physical conditions.

In conclusion, since nations seek development and fulfillment immedietly, ample investment in youth is imperative to elevate modern living standards. For economic, social and national perspective, fostering an interest in younger generation is beneficial. In short, the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both sides of the question and state a clear view in the introduction and conclusion: you believe the benefits of a younger population outweigh the drawbacks. The points about young people contributing to companies and national economies, and older people offering experience in problem-solving, are relevant. However, some ideas are less fully explained than others. For instance, the claim that young people can work “14 to 15 hours without a break” is presented as evidence but its relevance and reliability are not clarified. The flood example also needs more detail to show how combining age groups supports your argument. Develop these examples and explain more directly how the benefits outweigh the costs. The response meets the required length; the eight words copied from the task prompt are excluded from the count.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, separate paragraphs for contrasting views, and a conclusion that restates your position. Linking expressions such as “On the other hand,” “Moreover,” and “In conclusion” help signal the direction of the discussion. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes difficult to follow because several claims are placed together without clear explanation of their relationship. For example, the first body paragraph moves from investment in young people to working hours, company opportunities, innovation, and technology firms. Some transitions are also mechanical or awkward, including “At the one hand” and “At the same time.” Group related points and use clearer references and transitions so each paragraph develops one main idea logically.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt a range of topic-related vocabulary, including “national economies,” “innovative,” “experienced minds,” and “living standards.” These choices show an effort to discuss economic and social effects rather than relying only on basic terms. However, inaccurate word choice, collocation, and spelling are noticeable and sometimes make the meaning less clear. Examples include “population youth,” “a substantial amount of assest,” “positive doors,” and “contemporary siciety.” Some expressions, such as “young brains are more innovative,” are also imprecise for an academic argument. Aim for accurate, natural combinations and check spelling carefully. More precise wording will help your ideas sound clearer and more formal without requiring unnecessarily complicated vocabulary.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You use both simple sentences and attempts at more complex forms, including a concessive opening (“Although it might have some drawbacks”) and a reason clause (“because young people can utilize their time…”). The overall meaning is generally recoverable, but errors in sentence construction and grammatical forms occur across the response. For example, “The main reason behind it is the hard work because…” creates an unclear relationship between clauses, while “Most of the … platforms are also running by the young people” has an incorrect passive construction. There are also problems with articles, agreement, and sentence boundaries, as in “the significance of this situations.” Practise building complete, controlled sentences and check verb forms, singular/plural agreement, and punctuation. This will make your complex ideas easier to follow.

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