Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-19

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.

Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Nowadays, the population of some countries includes more young people than older people.

I believe that benefits outweigh drawbacks because of large workforce and innovation.

One of the main advantages is large workforce, because the young people they are the engain of country, also, workforce of young can hepls country to increase productivity of goods and services. Furthermore, they can increase the tax revenue this boost growth faster of economic.For example, large workforces in India this helped the technology and services fields grow faster.

Another advantages is the innovation, because most of youths grow up with technology. So, this make young people to adapt quickely with technologies and they are advengers

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You state a clear position—“benefits outweigh drawbacks”—and identify two relevant advantages: a larger workforce and innovation. The India example also begins to support the workforce point. However, the response addresses the task only minimally: it does not explain any disadvantages or compare them with the benefits, so the “outweigh” judgement is not established. The ideas are also very briefly developed; for instance, the claim that young workers increase productivity and tax revenue needs explanation or a specific illustration. The response is substantially below the required minimum of 250 words, which leaves important parts of the argument undeveloped. To improve, discuss at least one disadvantage, weigh it against the benefits, and extend each point with clear reasoning and relevant examples.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

There is some basic organisation: an opening states your view, followed by a paragraph on the workforce and another beginning to discuss innovation. Linking expressions such as “Furthermore” and “For example” show an attempt to connect ideas. However, progression is limited, and the second body paragraph ends abruptly, leaving the argument incomplete. Some connections are awkward or unclear, as in “this boost growth faster of economic,” and the repeated use of “because” makes the development feel mechanical. The reader can identify the main points, but the relationships between claims are not consistently clear. Use complete paragraphs with a topic sentence, explanation, and example, and add a concluding paragraph that directly answers whether the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “workforce,” “productivity,” “tax revenue,” “innovation,” and “technology.” These terms help communicate the general direction of your argument. However, the range is limited, and several inaccurate word choices or forms make parts difficult to understand. For example, “engain” appears to mean “engine,” “advengers” is unclear, and “workforce of young” is not a natural phrase. There are also spelling errors such as “quickely” and “hepls.” Aim to use familiar vocabulary accurately before attempting less certain expressions. Learning collocations such as “young people form a large share of the workforce” and “adapt quickly to new technologies” would make your ideas clearer and more natural.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple statements and longer sentences, and the opening—“I believe that benefits outweigh drawbacks”—communicates your position. However, the range of structures is limited, and attempts to combine clauses often contain frequent errors that can make the meaning difficult to follow. In “the young people they are the engain of country,” the subject is repeated and the article is missing; “this make young people” also has incorrect subject–verb agreement. The sentence beginning “Furthermore” lacks a clear grammatical connection between its clauses. Practise building accurate sentences with one main clause and a supporting clause, checking articles, agreement, and punctuation. For example: “Young people can increase productivity, which may raise tax revenue and support economic growth.”

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