Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-19

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.

Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The younger population in many countries have significantly increased in contrast to older population. A major youth population can help to develop their country, contributing to expanding their economy and generate revenue.

In order to develop and build industries in a country, having a youth population is essential. They can use their creative minds and incorporate ideas to create jobs for other people, work in various sectors reducing crisis of skilled workers. Many of the younger population are highly educated and possess diverse skills, all of which a country can heavily benefit from, if used rightly. For instance, IT sector is heavily dominated by millenials and generation z , who have establised themselves with their up-to-date knowledge of programming. Moreover, many entreprenuers are people who are under the age of forty and have made significant impact in advancement of technology and providing jobs.

However, having a large youth population can also possess some drawbacks. A rapidly growing population serves a threat to employment since most jobs have limited capacity, which increases youth unemployment. Many young people engage in unsolicited activities that include robbery, drugs that have a detrimental effect on them. This also results in housing crisis since most of the younger folks are unemployed, which could eventually increase in homelessness. In many parts of the world, younger generations suffer from mental illness and drug addiction due to unemployment which is a great concern.

Therefore, having a young population helps to sustain a creative and youthful environment at work, where they get to generate new ideas and help create diverse businesses. Despite the positive impact of a youthful population, I think that the negatives outweigh the positives since it increases the rate of unemployment and housing crisis.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You address both sides of the question and give a clear final judgement that the disadvantages outweigh the advantages. The benefits are supported with relevant points about innovation, skilled workers and entrepreneurship, including the example of technology businesses. You also identify unemployment, housing pressure and related social problems as drawbacks. This meets the task well, but the comparison is not fully developed: the essay does not explain why these disadvantages are more significant than the economic and employment benefits, and some claims—such as young people engaging in crime or drug use—are broad and need careful support. To strengthen the response, explain the scale or consequences of each side and connect the examples directly to your overall judgement.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, a paragraph on advantages, a paragraph on disadvantages and a conclusion. The progression from economic benefits to social costs is easy to follow, and signposts such as “However” and “Therefore” help show the direction of the argument. This is a coherent arrangement, though some links between ideas are mechanical or unclear. For example, “This also results in housing crisis” does not make clear whether unemployment or population growth is the direct cause, and the conclusion repeats earlier points rather than drawing the comparison together. Use more precise referencing and develop transitions that show how each point supports your judgement.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of topic vocabulary, including “skilled workers,” “youth unemployment,” “housing crisis,” “entrepreneurs” and “advancement of technology.” These choices make the main ideas clear, and you attempt some less common expressions. However, several word-choice and collocation problems reduce precision: “possess some drawbacks” is unnatural, “work in various sectors reducing crisis” is unclear, and “unsolicited activities” does not convey the intended meaning. There are also spelling errors in “millenials,” “establised” and “entreprenuers.” Aim for accurate, natural combinations and check spelling carefully; this would make your vocabulary more flexible and convincing without changing the substance of your ideas.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex forms, including clauses with “since,” “which” and “where,” and most sentences communicate the intended meaning. Some grammatical errors remain, however. The opening has a subject–verb agreement problem in “The younger population … have,” and “contributing to expanding their economy and generate revenue” does not maintain a parallel grammatical form. Articles and number are also inconsistent in phrases such as “a great concern” after several problems and “a housing crisis.” In addition, the long sentence beginning “Many of the younger population” would be clearer if its ideas were separated or more carefully structured. Review agreement, parallel forms and article use while retaining your attempts at complex sentences.

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