Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-20

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.

Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In this era , some people believe that, certain countries have a considerably higher proportion of young adults than elderly people in their populations.

Although this situation has some drawbacks, the positive aspects are greater than the negative ones.

On one hand the abscence or having less elderly people around means the loss of the tradition as well as the culture of our ancestors. It can impact the beliefs of younger generation when they don't have someone to guide towards path or an individual that teaches them manners or educate them in some way which can lead to corruption, violence and social pressure.

On the other hand countries that possesses a blooming youthful generation is more likely to acquire more creative ideas of development or various type of solutions for instance in the technology department they are more prone to come up with new ways or innovative ideas for projects than elderly people.

In my humble opinion young adults are like a flower that is going to bloom soon , it needs rich soil and watered with care in order to reach its best version of herself and in that context come the role of the seniors. They should share the pressure as well as the responsability of this seedling and train them properly , for a young student today is the citizen of tomorrow.

In conclusion having a youthful population is a both a bliss and a curse , a double edged sword but if handled with care and trust and trained properly it can be a reckoning forced to respective countries and its main shield.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You give a clear overall view that the benefits outweigh the drawbacks, and you address both sides by discussing cultural loss and the potential for young people to contribute ideas and development. However, the supporting points are only partly developed. For example, the claim that fewer older people may lead to “corruption, violence and social pressure” is not clearly explained, and the technology example remains general rather than showing how a youthful population benefits a country. Your final paragraph introduces the useful idea that seniors should guide young adults, but this relationship could be connected more directly to your comparison of advantages and disadvantages. Develop each main point with a specific explanation or example to make your argument more convincing.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, paragraphs presenting opposing considerations, your view, and a conclusion. The signposts “On one hand,” “On the other hand,” and “In conclusion” help readers follow the broad direction. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes unclear: the link between the absence of older people and outcomes such as violence is asserted rather than shown, while the paragraph about seniors guiding young adults shifts from the earlier comparison without a clear transition. Some linking is also mechanical, and the conclusion’s “bliss and a curse” repeats the contrast without summarising the reasons. Use clearer topic sentences and connect each explanation explicitly to your position.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You attempt a range of topic-related vocabulary, including “proportion,” “tradition,” “innovative ideas,” and “development,” and the central meaning is generally understandable. There are also some noticeable word-choice, collocation, and spelling problems that make parts less natural, such as “acquire more creative ideas,” “various type of solutions,” and “a reckoning forced.” “Abscence” and “responsability” are misspelled, and “blooming youthful generation” is an awkward combination. The flower and seedling imagery shows an effort to express ideas vividly, but it takes space without adding much precision. Aim for accurate, natural collocations and choose vocabulary that states the argument directly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a conditional clause in “when they don't have someone to guide” and a longer sentence beginning “Although this situation has some drawbacks.” However, errors in agreement, articles, plurals, and sentence construction are frequent enough to make some sentences awkward or difficult to process. For example, “countries that possesses” has a subject–verb agreement error, and “a both a bliss and a curse” has an incorrect article structure. The sentence beginning “It can impact the beliefs” also contains an unclear construction around “guide towards path.” Review agreement and article use, and divide long sentences when their relationships between ideas are not clear. Check punctuation spacing as well.

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