Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-22

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.

Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

It is widely believed that the number of adults people is heigher then older people has both advantages and disadvantages. While there are some negative aspects, I am convineed that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. Adults has more creative and inteligent brain, it makes new idea's and new technology whic make life conviniant.

One of the most notable benefits is that younger people has high clever mindset and more creative thinking pawoer compare to old people. This is because old people is not able to think and apply new works and idea's and due thier age they need to someone's phisical support which crate cuses. For example, in hieh level tech company has young and adult emplye make company grow by there creative mindset and idea's. As a result company gain more profites and achive new customers.

Moreover, adult has many skill which make their work eassy and comftable. So they publish new invention and produse the relevent product and thinks which make human life convineant.

However, there are also certain drawbacks. One key disadvantages is this adults are very angr and huminity less. This can lead to make their work and invention in wrong way and increase teririsam. Therfore the parcular cuntry people face many problem and the value of county is being less.

In conclusionalthougn there are some disadvantages, the ad

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You state a clear overall view—“the advantages outweigh the disadvantages”—and include both sides, with examples involving technology companies and possible social harm. However, the response only partially develops the task: the benefits rely mainly on broad claims that young adults are more creative and skilled, while the disadvantage about anger and terrorism is asserted without a clear explanation or relevant support. The comparison between advantages and disadvantages is therefore not convincingly established. The conclusion is also cut off (“In conclusionalthougn there are some disadvantages, the ad”), so it does not complete your answer or restate your reasoning. In addition, the response is 27 words below the required minimum. Develop each main point with a clear explanation and a specific, plausible example, then finish with a complete conclusion.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, paragraphs presenting benefits, a paragraph on drawbacks, and an attempted conclusion. Linking expressions such as “One of the most notable benefits,” “Moreover,” and “However” help signal the direction of the discussion. However, progression within paragraphs is often difficult to follow because claims are placed next to one another without clear explanation—for example, the move from older people needing support to technology companies growing through young employees. Some references, such as “this” in “One key disadvantages is this adults,” are unclear, and the final sentence is incomplete, disrupting the overall ending. Organise each body paragraph around one main idea, explain how it supports your position, and use linking words to show the relationship between ideas rather than simply introduce them.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You attempt vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “creative thinking,” “technology,” “invention,” “drawbacks,” and “terrorism.” These choices show an effort to discuss both economic and social effects. However, the range is limited and many spelling and word-choice errors make parts of the response difficult to understand, such as “convineant,” “pawoer,” “phisical support,” and “teririsam.” Some phrases are also unnatural or imprecise: “high clever mindset” and “make human life convenient” do not express the ideas clearly. Build a reliable set of topic vocabulary and check spelling, word forms, and collocations. Prefer precise expressions such as “a skilled workforce” or “support older relatives” over unclear combinations.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You use some simple sentences and attempt longer structures, including “While there are some negative aspects, I am convinced…” and “This is because…”. This gives the response some variety, but control is inconsistent. Subject–verb agreement errors occur in “Adults has” and “younger people has”; articles and sentence construction are also problematic in “in hieh level tech company has young and adult emplye.” The opening comparison, “the number of adults people is higher then older people,” is not grammatically complete, and the conclusion ends mid-sentence. These errors sometimes make the intended meaning hard to follow. Practise accurate subject–verb agreement and complete sentence patterns first, then use subordinate clauses to explain causes and results. Proofread each sentence for a clear subject, verb, and finished thought.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.