Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-23

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.

Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Nowday's, the population of some countries large number of young adults are higher as compared to elder people although, this trend can faced my challanges.I believe that advantages outweigh from disadvantages because young adults contribute in economy growth and new developments. In addition, younger helped in new innovation and larger tax- payer as well as elder people's.

To begin with, the population of younger in some countries are relatively high, they contribute in new innovation or their workforce for more productivity.In addition, new generation participating in different workshops or learn new skills and find the best solution and problem easily although,the younger is larger tax payer or contributed to our government to generate the revenue.For instance, the younger are often willing new skills and use modern techniques and started new business. Furthermore, the younger adults are assests for our country long term development.

Moreover, the unemployements is the high proportion in all over the world the younger faced these issues day by day because unemployement is increasing.In addition, the government want to invested in education and improve enterpeneurial ideas or provide employements opportunities in companies or factories,these implementations must be better for our youngers

In conclusion, at the present day the population of all countries include relatively high of younger as compared to older peoples although, the advantages outweigh from the dmerits because young generation is long term assests of countries developments they helped to improve economy and generated new ideas and technology. Therefore, they improve effective growth and social progress.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You give a clear overall answer: you believe the benefits of a younger population outweigh the drawbacks, and you identify economic growth, innovation, tax revenue and long-term development as advantages. These points are relevant, but the response only partly develops the comparison asked for. The paragraph on unemployment introduces a disadvantage, yet it does not explain how this drawback weighs against the benefits or give a specific example. Several advantages, such as young people’s contribution to productivity and business, are repeated rather than supported with clear reasoning. To strengthen the response, explain one or two benefits in depth, develop the unemployment concern, and make the weighing-up explicit in the conclusion.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion, and the reader can generally identify the main point of each section. You also use linking expressions such as “To begin with,” “Moreover” and “In conclusion.” However, progression within paragraphs is often unclear: the first body paragraph moves from innovation to workshops, tax revenue and business without showing how these points connect. Connectors such as “In addition” are repeated, and some sentences run ideas together, making relationships difficult to follow. Use a clearer topic sentence for each paragraph, group related points, and use linking words only where they accurately show the relationship between ideas.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You attempt vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “productivity,” “tax-payer,” “revenue,” “entrepreneurial ideas” and “social progress.” This shows some effort to use topic-specific language, but the range is limited and several word choices, forms and spellings make the meaning less clear. Examples include “new innovation,” “the younger,” “assests,” “unemployements” and “dmerits.” Some phrases are also unnatural, such as “larger tax payer” and “long term development” when describing young adults. Build a more accurate set of collocations for population and employment topics, and check spelling and word forms carefully. More precise vocabulary would help distinguish the benefits from the unemployment-related drawback.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and longer sentences, including a contrast with “although” and a reason introduced by “because.” However, the longer structures are often faulty, and errors in agreement, verb forms, articles and sentence boundaries frequently make the message difficult to follow. For example, “the population … are relatively high” has a subject–verb agreement problem, while “the government want to invested” combines an incorrect verb form with agreement error. The opening sentence also lacks a clear grammatical structure, and commas are often used where a full stop is needed. Practise building accurate simple sentences first, then combine them with one controlled subordinate clause; check each sentence for a clear subject and correctly formed verb.

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