Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-24
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.
Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
At that time,the population of younger adults relatively a large number in some countries as compared to the number of old age people.I strongly agree that the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages.I will discuss in this eassy on both point of veiw.
On the one hand,young people help in economic growth because young people can work in different industries.The teenager also increase a country productivity and by the help of this more worker can contribute to economic development.As compared to old people the younger generation may learn new technologies quickly and also they have very sharp mind, they introduced new idea to businesses.For example, young age people has sharp mind how to grow business and become more competitive.
On the other hand, if there is a large population of young adults there is less job opportunities and large number of teenager become jobless.This can be harmfull for their health because this causes creat mentally disorderd and make more finicial pressure on them.This can also effect pressure on public services more adults need schools,universities,and housing to live then government should spend more money to providing this facilities to them.
In conclusion,there are some drwabacks of this sittuation for government and on official economy, but i stronglly agree that the advantages of this situation should outweigh the disadvantages because they may helpfull more for business growth and make a economy stronger more.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
You take a clear position that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages and address both sides. The economic contribution of young workers and their ability to adopt technology are relevant advantages, while unemployment and pressure on public services are relevant disadvantages. However, these points are only briefly explained: for example, the claim that young people have a “sharp mind” and help businesses become competitive is not supported with a specific example or a clear explanation of how this benefits society. The conclusion repeats your view but does not weigh the two sides in detail. The response is 225 words, so it is 25 words below the 250-word minimum; the eight words copied from the task prompt are not counted. Develop each main point with explanation or an example to address the task more fully.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, separate paragraphs for advantages and disadvantages, and a conclusion. “On the one hand” and “On the other hand” help signal the contrast, and the reader can generally follow the main ideas. However, progression within paragraphs is limited, and some links are mechanical or unclear. For instance, “by the help of this” does not clearly show how productivity leads to economic development, while the final sentence combines several ideas without a clear relationship. The introduction also promises discussion of “both point,” but the essay does not establish a more precise line of argument. Use clearer links between cause and effect, and organise each paragraph around one developed point.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “economic growth,” “industries,” “economic development,” “job opportunities,” and “public services.” This gives you enough language to communicate the broad argument. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, sometimes making the meaning difficult to follow. Examples include “old age people,” “increase a country productivity,” “create mentally disorderd,” and “effect pressure on public services.” Spelling errors such as “harmfull,” “finicial,” and “sittuation” also reduce accuracy. Build a more precise vocabulary for employment, public spending, and economic contribution, and check spelling and natural word combinations before submitting.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
You attempt both simple and more extended sentences, including a conditional structure in “if there is a large population of young adults” and a comparison beginning “As compared to old people.” However, the range is limited, and errors occur frequently in sentence construction, agreement, articles, and verb forms. For example, “the population of younger adults relatively a large number” lacks a complete grammatical structure, while “young age people has” has incorrect agreement. The sentence about unemployment and health also joins ideas in a way that makes the relationship hard to understand. Punctuation spacing and sentence boundaries need attention as well. Practise building accurate subject–verb–object sentences first, then add subordinate clauses and check each sentence for agreement and completeness.
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