Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-30

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.

Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Nowadays, in some countries, population of young adults are higher in number as compared to the older people .I believe that advantages are more significant and outweigh the disadvantages in term of lager workforce, business development and innovative ideas which improve the economic growth.

One major advantage of large young population is that they have a more creative ideas which they utilise to improve the economic growth. young people has a good technological skills and good approach to solve economic problems. For instance, they can represent their ideas to government related to housing schemes, rise in food production and it can only be improve when someone try to handle it professionally. Another benefit is the expansion of business . For instance , the larger working-age population can increase the consumer demand which encourage business to expand. When large number of young adults work together and exchange their thoughts regarding the business then it is more successfully expanded . There are some disadvantages to consider . If number of young adults are larger, it leads to over-population . Governments are being pressurised by public to increase their resources . for instance, if some country faced the over population , then food resources would be limited. furthermore, when there is less job opportunity for the youth so it cause the unemployment . for instance, youth has completed their higher education but they don't have not a good employment opportunity that they work and use their practical skill which they learn form their degree. In conclusion, a proportion of young adults provides benefits to the government by sharing their innovative ideas and good approach ,i believe that its negative impact such unemployment and limited resources can outweigh the advantages if the population will not manage properly .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear: you argue that the benefits of a large young-adult population outweigh its drawbacks, and you address both sides of the question. The points about young people contributing ideas and expanding businesses are relevant, as are concerns about pressure on resources and unemployment. However, some ideas are more fully explained than others. The business-demand point has a clear cause-and-effect link, while the example about young people proposing housing schemes and increasing food production is difficult to follow and does not clearly show how it supports economic growth. The conclusion also introduces the condition that population must be managed, but this qualification could be explained more fully. Develop each main point with a clearer example and link it directly to your judgement.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a coherent overall arrangement: an introduction states your view, separate paragraphs discuss advantages and disadvantages, and a conclusion returns to the issue. You also use signposting such as “One major advantage,” “Another benefit,” and “In conclusion” to guide the reader. However, some connections are mechanical or unclear. For example, “For instance” introduces examples that do not always clearly illustrate the preceding claim, and the shift from limited resources to unemployment could be linked more explicitly. References such as “it” in “it can only be improve” are also unclear. To strengthen progression, organise each body paragraph around one main claim, then explain its consequence and give a directly relevant example.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a relevant range of topic vocabulary, including “workforce,” “consumer demand,” “economic growth,” “unemployment,” and “resources.” These choices help communicate the main ideas, and you attempt more specific expressions such as “working-age population” and “practical skill.” However, inaccurate word choice, collocation, and spelling are noticeable and sometimes make meaning less precise. Examples include “lager workforce,” “a more creative ideas,” “good technological skills,” and “more successfully expanded.” Some phrases are also repeated, particularly “young adults” and “for instance.” Aim to learn common word partnerships and check spelling and word forms; more precise vocabulary will make your arguments clearer without requiring unnecessarily complex wording.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including conditional and cause-and-effect structures such as “If number of young adults are larger, it leads to over-population” and “when there is less job opportunity … it cause the unemployment.” This shows an effort to vary sentence forms, but errors in agreement, articles, verb forms, and sentence construction remain frequent enough to affect clarity. For example, “population … are higher” should use a singular verb, while “young people has” should be “young people have.” The sentence beginning “youth has completed their higher education” also contains conflicting subject–verb and pronoun forms. Practise checking each sentence’s subject and verb, and use shorter, controlled sentences when a longer structure becomes difficult to manage.

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