Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-11-01
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.
Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Population of adults is relatively large in many countries as compared to aged ones. The significant increase in number of Young ones might be due to Mortality rates and risk of diseases to elder people. Older people have lower life span than younger ones.
In my perspective, the advantages outweigh disadvantages as the country will get a Younger population for generating employment. Younger minds are active and more productive for creating new ideas and executing them properly. However, the younger workforce will contribute in develpment of a country. For instance, if a young teenager and an elderly person and test their productivity and creativeness the youth will always be better. New generation can bring new ideas supporting digital technologies and industrial development.Job opportunities to youths can be a good source of revenue and tax generation of the country. Research programs, innovative ideas and contribution of strong will power of youths can make a country grow from base to the top.
Despite of various advantages there are some drawbacks like Overly populated youth may lead to lack of Jobs, umemplyment and unmanaged develpoments.Elderly people are always needed for guidance related to any possible activities and achievements.The investment of government for studies and skills oriented services may lead to unstable economic condition.
In Conclusion, highly populated youths may lead to unemployment and low public services, I believe its advantages are greater as a younger generation can drive economic stability and a well managed work force with good policies to support a country's long term prosperity.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
Your position is clear: you believe the benefits of a large young-adult population outweigh the drawbacks. You give relevant points about productivity, innovation, employment and tax revenue, and you acknowledge risks such as unemployment and pressure on public services. However, the discussion is only partly developed. For example, the claim that young people are more productive than older people is supported by a hypothetical comparison rather than a specific, convincing example, and the point about government investment is not clearly explained. The opening also focuses on mortality and life span rather than directly framing the advantages and disadvantages. Develop each main point with a clear explanation of how it affects the country, and make the comparison between benefits and costs more explicit.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, a paragraph supporting the advantages, a paragraph on disadvantages and a conclusion. The contrast signalled by “However” and “Despite” helps readers follow the shift in focus. Nevertheless, progression within paragraphs is sometimes unclear: the advantages paragraph moves quickly from productivity to technology, tax revenue and research without showing how these points connect. Some linking is also awkward or repetitive, and the conclusion repeats the position without drawing together the main comparison. Use topic sentences to establish each paragraph’s central idea, then order supporting explanations and examples logically. Clearer references and more precise transitions would make the overall argument easier to follow.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “workforce,” “digital technologies,” “unemployment,” “economic stability” and “long term prosperity.” This gives you a basic range for discussing population and development. However, several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or unnatural, such as “aged ones,” “generating employment,” “unstable economic condition” and “contribution of strong will power.” Spelling errors, including “develpment,” “umemplyment” and “develpoments,” also make the writing less polished. Aim for precise, natural combinations such as “create jobs,” “economic instability” and “a strong work ethic.” Check spelling carefully and avoid capitalising common nouns such as “Young” and “Mortality” mid-sentence.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, and the overall meaning is generally understandable. However, control is uneven, particularly in longer sentences. For example, “For instance, if a young teenager and an elderly person and test their productivity…” lacks a clear grammatical structure, while “Despite of various advantages” uses an incorrect preposition. There are also problems with articles, agreement and sentence boundaries, as in “the country will get a Younger population” and “development.Job opportunities.” Some clauses are joined without clear punctuation, which makes relationships between ideas harder to follow. Practise building complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, and check articles, prepositions and punctuation when editing.
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