Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-11-02

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.

Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In this revolutionized era, some countries large poprotion of the people are young compared with the odler ones. However , i think it will be beneficial for the country as well economy, and it advantages outweigh the disadvantages.

On the one hand,young peolpe tremendously contribute to economic growth since they are more energetic, productive and willing to learn new skills comprehensively. However, they can easily involve with job market compared with the older people. For instance, young people may do several part time work on week , which are not possible by elderly because they have less enthusiam and energy to address with any circumtances . As a result, it helps younger to step out of their comfort zones and broaden their horizons. Another predominant side is young people often more open to new technologies and innovative ideas, which can not only improve their productivity but also make society more advanced and convenienced.As an evidance showed that, many young entrepreneurs in Bangladesh are starting online business and creates employment opportunities for others.

On the other hand, older people also plays a crucial role in families and societies. To be precise, older people helps to teach younger about moral values, kindness and responsibilities in order to having a comfortable life. Furthermore, elderly people can preserve our cultural heritage and helping generations understand their history and tradition. For instance, grandparents often telling story their grandchildren about traditional customs , family values so that they can remember their nation history ever after.

In conclusion, although older people play a increadible role for younger upbringing as well as societies, i believe government should protect our younger heros for county's development .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear: you believe a large young population benefits a country, and the conclusion repeats this view. You address both sides by discussing young people’s contribution to economic growth and technology, then older people’s roles in teaching values and preserving culture. These are relevant points, and the Bangladesh example gives the economic argument some support. However, the comparison is not fully developed: you do not explain clearly why the benefits outweigh the disadvantages, and the older generation’s role is described without showing how it offsets or limits the advantages. The point about young people taking several part-time jobs is also not clearly connected to national development. Develop the comparison and explain the consequences of each main idea more explicitly.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two sides, and a conclusion. The progression from young people’s economic contribution to older people’s social role is generally easy to follow, and phrases such as “On the one hand” and “On the other hand” help signal the contrast. However, some links are mechanical or unclear. For example, “However” appears within the paragraph about young people without establishing a clear contrast, and “As a result” does not clearly follow from the point about part-time work. The final paragraph also introduces the idea of government protection without explaining how it relates to the argument. Use linking expressions to show precise relationships between ideas, and make references and transitions clearer.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You attempt a range of vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “economic growth,” “innovative ideas,” “cultural heritage,” and “employment opportunities.” These choices help communicate the main themes, and some less common expressions show an effort to be precise. However, inaccurate word forms, spelling, and collocations are noticeable and sometimes make the meaning less clear: examples include “poprotion,” “convenienced,” “increadible,” and “involve with job market.” Some phrases also sound unnatural, such as “young heros for county's development.” Aim for accurate, natural combinations rather than more elaborate wording. Proofread spelling and check how verbs and nouns typically combine; this will make your vocabulary more effective and easier to understand.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You use both simple statements and attempts at longer, complex sentences, including clauses with “since,” “which,” and “so that.” This gives the response some structural variety, and the main ideas can generally be understood. However, errors in sentence structure, agreement, articles, and verb forms occur across the response. For example, “older people also plays” should use a plural verb, while “older people helps” has the same agreement problem. In “grandparents often telling story,” the verb form and noun construction are incomplete. Punctuation and spacing are also inconsistent, particularly around commas and sentence openings. Practise building accurate complex sentences and check subject–verb agreement and complete verb forms before adding further clauses.

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