Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-11-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.

Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

it is true that with the passage of time populaiton of the young people are increasing as to olders all over the world. in some of the countires the young genration is getting bigger matching to older generation. in my prespective i strongly agree that the pros of this situation is outweigh the cons and i will discuss this in the eassy.

first of all, one of the huge benefits of the younger generation is that they are innovative.for example, young generation are using their minds and skills in the field of AI and generate the new version of the AI which quite helpful and advance. the other advantage of the having young adults is they can give benefit to the country economic growth such as workforce and productive minds will leads the country towards growth for example the young minds will intriduce new business and new ideas which will be beneficial for region and this cause expand in export of a country.

well, deside advantages there is a some disadvantages too. the first one is pressure on resources like there will be will bw huge burden on educational istitues and also will be on transport. furthermore, the other con is job competition which leads young people towards unemployment additonally this will also badly effect our enviornment for example greater in the percentage of unemployment will lead toward crimes like thef or murder futhermore this will affect their mental health too.

concluding the topic, increment in the young generation is a positive situation. the benefit of young generation is that they lead a region toward growth both in ecocnomically and technology. also there is some of cons like unemployment and minimum resources but the government need to work on it provide such platforms for the younger adults.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

Your position is clear: you argue that the benefits of a large young-adult population outweigh the drawbacks, and you address both sides before reaching a conclusion. The points about innovation, economic growth, pressure on education and transport, and competition for jobs are relevant. The examples involving AI and new businesses also begin to support your claims. However, some ideas are asserted rather than fully explained: for instance, the link between unemployment and crime or environmental harm needs clearer reasoning, and the advantages receive more development than the disadvantages. To strengthen the response, explain how each point affects a country and add a specific, relevant example. Your conclusion restates your view, but could more directly weigh the benefits against the costs.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall structure, with an introduction, separate paragraphs for advantages and disadvantages, and a conclusion. This makes the main line of argument easy to identify. You also use signposting such as “first of all,” “furthermore,” and “concluding the topic.” At times, however, these links feel mechanical, and some connections between ideas are unclear. In the disadvantages paragraph, the move from job competition to environmental effects, crime, and mental health is abrupt; explain the relationship between these points or organise them into a more focused sequence. Referencing is also occasionally vague, as in “this will affect their mental health.” Use clearer links and pronouns, and make each paragraph develop one central idea progressively.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some topic-relevant vocabulary, including “innovative,” “workforce,” “economic growth,” “unemployment,” and “resources,” so the reader can understand the main argument. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, which sometimes makes the meaning less clear. Examples include “the pros … is outweigh the cons,” “give benefit to the country economic growth,” and “expand in export.” Spelling errors such as “populaiton,” “countires,” and “enviornment” are also noticeable. Build a more precise set of phrases for discussing demographics and the economy, and check spelling carefully. Using accurate collocations such as “contribute to economic growth” will make your ideas sound clearer and more natural.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more extended sentences, including clauses introduced by “which,” “such as,” and “for example.” This allows you to express several connected ideas, but control is uneven: errors in agreement, verb forms, articles, and sentence construction occur across the response and can make some sentences difficult to follow. For example, “the pros … is outweigh the cons” has an agreement and verb-form problem, while “workforce and productive minds will leads” uses an incorrect verb form. Some sentences also contain incomplete or tangled constructions, such as “there will be will bw huge burden.” Practise building accurate sentences around one main clause, then add subordinate clauses only when their relationship is clear. Review punctuation and sentence boundaries as well.

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