Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-11-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.

Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In many countries population of young individuals higher than the old persons. thise creates the huge work force to work and creats the new concep, which will assist to grow economy of the nation. However, there are some nagative impact of this. Large number of young individuals need more funds to educate and need natural resoures for improve the quality of lifes. I argu that have the large number of young population will help to economy to grow faster because young individuals can work hard and creat new technology to work.

There are several positive impact of have high number of the young population as compare to old peopel. Young people have more energy and they can work for companys more effectaly, so multinational companyes might to investe in those countries. also the educated peopel can innovate new technology and gernarete new idea which will incrases the GDP and also there is less burden to gives the penson to oldcitizen. Due to large number of workers and new innovation the growth of the gdp will rise. The clear example of this is India where most of the peopel is young and they have largest work force in the world, so this make them fastest growing economy in the world.

There are several disadvantages of have large young poplulation as compared to old people, paticular in education sectore and need of natural resoures. Before the have a job individuals have to studey, so give the education to individuals are government respnosibility and this make financial burden on governments. Futhermore young peopel need large number of natural resoures, paticular fule, foods, metal. This increases the demand of the natural goods and services. As a result the burden on natur will rise. Te clear example of this China. For give the education to young student, goverment borrow the funds and harm the nature to fulfil the requirement of younger people

in concultion, It is very hard tell result of have young large population because there are several advantages and disadvantages of this. But i strongly believe that have the large number of the young population have high advantages

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You address both sides of the question and give a clear overall view: the benefits of a large young population outweigh its drawbacks. The discussion of workers, innovation, investment and reduced pension pressure is relevant, and the India example helps illustrate the economic argument. You also identify costs involving education and natural resources, with China as an example. This covers the task well, but the conclusion briefly says it is “very hard” to tell the result, which weakens the otherwise clear position. Some points, especially how resource pressure affects a country and how the China example supports that claim, need fuller explanation. Develop these links and make the final judgement consistent with your stated view.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable overall structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs for advantages and disadvantages, and a conclusion. This makes the main line of discussion easy to follow. You use linking expressions such as “However,” “Furthermore,” and “As a result,” to show contrast and consequence. At times, though, connections are mechanical or unclear. For example, “Due to large number of workers and new innovation the growth of the gdp will rise” repeats the preceding point, while the China example is not clearly linked to the claim about borrowing and environmental harm. The conclusion also shifts from a firm preference to saying the outcome is hard to judge. Use clearer references and ensure each example directly supports the point in its paragraph.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “work force,” “multinational companies,” “innovate,” “GDP,” “financial burden,” and “natural resources.” These choices show an attempt to discuss economic and environmental effects. However, the range is limited and several noticeable spelling and word-choice errors make the writing less precise, such as “nagative,” “resoures,” “paticular,” and “penson.” Some phrases are also unnatural or imprecise: “new concep,” “natural goods and services,” and “the burden on natur.” Aim to learn accurate collocations and check spelling carefully. For example, use “generate new ideas” rather than “gernerate new idea,” and “pressure on natural resources” rather than “burden on nature.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including cause-and-effect structures such as “As a result…” and clauses beginning with “Before…”. However, control is uneven, and errors in sentence structure, agreement, articles and verb forms sometimes make the reader work to understand the meaning. Examples include “there are several positive impact,” “this make them fastest growing economy,” and “I strongly believe that have the large number… have high advantages.” Several sentences also omit necessary grammatical elements, as in “Before the have a job individuals have to studey.” Practise building accurate subject–verb–object sentences first, then add subordinate clauses. Check singular/plural agreement and article use, and revise the conclusion into a complete, direct sentence.

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