Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-11-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains betweeen cities. But some people believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport.

Firstly, i belive the money should be spend on improving public transport,

Because public transport is very important. Sometimes, the train is not available.So, people can be travel in local buses. The local buses are available and reasonable give amount by people.

For example, Some students give the paper in the exam hall, students wait the train, the train will be delay. So the student worried about their exam and upset. Because the trains do not exact a time. Some times the train reachd before a time, Some times after the time, M in pronblem is time.

Morever, The train facilities is good, But sometimes is not good. The train

mostly people use they travel long time. Because, people choose fast trains, people considered train is good comparision by local busus and publuic transport. When the people will be go long tour,So, they are chose the train. But train benifite, When the train will be travel in another cities, But train use only city i think is good for people. Because beteen cities already avalaible local buses and other transport fasilities.

In my openion, both right people will be train drive a between cities and public transport shoud be improve. Some peole can not afford the train expence, they can afford public transport.

I agree shoul be improving public transport.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You state a preference for improving public transport, and you briefly acknowledge the case for fast trains between cities. However, the discussion of both views is limited: the benefits of high-speed rail are not clearly explained, while the points about buses and train delays are difficult to connect to the question. The example about students waiting for a delayed train is relevant in principle, but its explanation is unclear and does not show how investment in existing transport would help. Your position is also inconsistent: you say both views are right, then conclude that public transport should be improved. The response is 225 words, below the 250-word minimum; 32 words copied from the task prompt were not counted. Develop each side with a clear reason and a specific supporting example, then state one consistent opinion.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

There is an attempt to organise the response into paragraphs and to signal ideas with phrases such as “Firstly,” “Moreover,” and “In my opinion.” These features give the reader some indication of the intended structure. However, ideas are not arranged in a clear, logical progression, and several sentences are hard to follow or do not connect clearly to the main point. For example, the discussion moves from bus availability to students’ exams and then to train punctuality without explaining the links. The paragraph beginning “Moreover” shifts between train facilities, long journeys, and city transport, so its central argument is unclear. Use one paragraph for each view, keep each paragraph focused on one main reason, and use clear references and transitions to show how examples support that reason.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use some task-related vocabulary, including “public transport,” “local buses,” “fast trains,” and “between cities,” so the topic is generally recognisable. However, the range is basic and repetitive, and frequent spelling and word-choice errors make parts of the response difficult to understand. Examples include “betweeen,” “benifite,” “publuic,” and “fasilities.” Some phrases are also unnatural or unclear, such as “reasonable give amount,” “do not exact a time,” and “good comparision by local buses.” Aim to use accurate, natural collocations rather than repeating “good” and “people.” For instance, describe whether services are “reliable,” “affordable,” or “frequent,” and explain whether high-speed rail is “more convenient” or “more costly.” Proofreading spelling would also improve clarity.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt both short statements and longer sentences, and the reader can sometimes identify the intended meaning. However, the range of sentence structures is limited, and errors in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence construction are frequent enough to make several ideas unclear. Examples include “the money should be spend,” “people can be travel,” and “the train facilities is good.” The sentence “Some students give the paper in the exam hall, students wait the train” joins ideas without a clear grammatical relationship. Capitalisation and punctuation are also inconsistent, including sentence fragments beginning with “Because” and missing spaces after full stops. Practise accurate simple sentences first, then combine related ideas with correctly formed clauses, such as “If a train is delayed, students may arrive late for their exams.”

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