Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-07-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In some countries, some people argues that the money should be spent on building new railway tracks so that the travel time between cities can get fast, other people thinks that the money should used for the existing public facilities.

To begin with, The population is doubled than previous decades. It has been seen that in a house there is at least one vehicle for a travel purpose. Because of that the number of vehicles are increased in recent times, where a scientific study says that the amount of carbon emission are increasing because of many things, for example cars, bikes, air conditioners etc. Where the pollution kept increasing, there was no drop seen regarding this. So, to reduces the amount of time as well as pollution people are demanding to spend building new railway routes.

Moreover, when new tracks are interconnected so that can makes a public transport more useful than a personal vehicle, it can reduces cost and is time efficient. Where other people discussion is it to update the current public transport system, it is a good thought where the amount money is not a big deal compared to constructing new railway lines. The current system gets updated with where new systems which can help to reduces traffic congestion, trains can travel fast as well as a tracking system which can improve the timings.

In conclusion, in my opinion I strongly believe that both arguments can be very helpful and useful if the planning is done sincerely by the railway authorities.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both views regarding high-speed rail versus improving existing public transport. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat superficial. While you mention pollution and traffic congestion, the arguments lack specific examples or detailed reasoning to fully support your points. Furthermore, your own opinion is stated in the conclusion rather than being clearly established and maintained throughout the essay. To improve, ensure you dedicate a full paragraph to each perspective and explicitly state your position in the introduction, consistently supporting it throughout the body paragraphs.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate, such as the repetitive use of 'Where' to start sentences (e.g., 'Where the pollution kept increasing...'). The logical progression between ideas is sometimes disjointed, making it difficult to follow the flow of the argument. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of linking words and phrases, such as 'consequently,' 'furthermore,' or 'in contrast,' and ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence that relates back to the prompt.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but remains quite basic and repetitive. There are instances of awkward phrasing, such as 'the money should used' and 'the amount money is not a big deal.' You rely on simple descriptors like 'fast' and 'good,' which limits the sophistication of your argument. To reach a higher band, try to incorporate more precise academic vocabulary related to transport and urban planning, and pay closer attention to collocations to ensure your word choices sound natural in an academic context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, including subject-verb agreement issues (e.g., 'some people argues,' 'the number of vehicles are increased') and incorrect verb forms (e.g., 'it can reduces cost'). While you attempt some complex sentence structures, they are often marred by these errors, which occasionally impede the clarity of your message. To improve, focus on mastering basic subject-verb agreement and the correct use of modal verbs. Proofreading your work for these common errors before finishing will significantly improve your score.

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