Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-04

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is undeniable that, in number of nations mode of transportation has major impact on life of individual. In this regard, some people find it necessary to utilise funds on constructing new railway lines for fast trains while others argue that instead the money should be spent on improvement of existing public transportation. This essay will not only outline both perspectives but also my opinion which is in favour of latter point of view in forthcoming fragments with logical conclusion.

To commence with, those who deem that improvement of existing public transportation is better alternative have their own reasons. First and foremost is lower cost. To explain, it is universal that refurbishment costs less than building new and small amount of funds will be needed for improvement of public transports like buses and so on. Secondly, connecting remote or rural areas with urban ones. To elaborate, as the already established transportation system follows a specific path which can be changed or improved so that countryside and cities could be linked. For example, countries like Japan use existing transportation means to travel from urban to rural or vise versa. Moreover, reduced government burden. For an epitome, as refurbishment will cost less, it would cause less burden on government finance and remaining funds could be used elsewhere. For example then government would be able to use that fund on healthcare or improvement of other infrastructure in the country. These are the main points due to which a proportion of population tilts toward improving existing public transportation instead of introduction to new.

However, there are few points that favor the former point of view. Such as people will able to experience more comfort. To explain, it is often noticed that newer infrastructure has better facilities, improvements than the existing ones and is more likely to be appreciated by public.

To conclude, although there are few points in the favor of former view point such as comfort yet the merits of latter point like lower costs, less government burden, linking of urban and rural areas and so on completely outweigh them.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear personal opinion in the introduction and conclusion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat uneven. While the arguments for improving existing transport are well-supported with reasons like cost and connectivity, the counter-argument regarding high-speed rail is underdeveloped, consisting of only one short paragraph that lacks specific examples or depth. To reach a higher band, ensure that both sides of the discussion are given equal weight and that the supporting points are fully extended with relevant evidence or logical consequences.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, and there is a logical progression of ideas throughout. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'To commence with', 'First and foremost', and 'However'. However, some of these devices are used in a slightly mechanical or repetitive way. Additionally, there are minor issues with referencing and flow, such as the phrase 'in forthcoming fragments', which sounds unnatural in an academic essay. The transition between the body paragraphs is generally clear, but the overall cohesion could be improved by using a wider variety of linking words and ensuring that the relationship between sentences is more fluid.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the writer to convey their meaning clearly. There are attempts to use less common vocabulary, such as 'refurbishment', 'epitome', and 'undeniable'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'introduction to new' (should be 'introduction of new systems') and 'vise versa' (spelling error: 'vice versa'). The use of 'epitome' is also slightly misused in this context. To improve, focus on using collocations more accurately and expanding the range of academic vocabulary to avoid repetitive phrasing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with articles ('in number of nations', 'on improvement of existing'), prepositions, and pluralization ('public transports'). Some sentences are slightly awkward, such as 'some people find it necessary to utilise funds on constructing'. While these errors do not impede communication, they are persistent throughout the text. To achieve a higher score, focus on mastering article usage and ensuring subject-verb agreement, as well as refining the use of complex sentence structures to ensure they are error-free.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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