Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In today's rapidly changing world many aspects of life are evolving significantly. In a number of independent states some residents believe that we should spend large amounts of financial resources on the construction of new railway net for fast trains between cities. Whereas some believe that we should spent money on improvement of already available public transport. This essay will shed light on two different views of citizens living in a country before reaching the conclusion.

In the view of some people new railway lines should be made because there aren't enough trains already. Moreover, new and advanced faster trains will help people get to various locations quite Fastly and it will be a lot more comfortable for some people who are suffering from some disabilities additionally, for those as well who are quite old. These new trains will also be good to be introduced because of vast increase in population in recent decades.

On the other hand, some people have a belief that instead of building new tracks and trains we should focus on improving existing transport first. According to them building new ones from scratch will be a waste of money and it will take a lot of time as well. For example, we can improve lot of transport vehicles before a new one will be made.

In conclusion, both of these views are valid and acceptable but, in my opinion, the latter one is more acceptable and better for public as well. We can simply improve the existing one to a level at which they can work as they were newly built.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear personal opinion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, the argument for high-speed trains mentions 'disabilities' and 'old' people, but does not explain why high-speed rail is specifically better for these groups compared to improved local transport. Similarly, the counter-argument lacks specific examples or depth, relying on general statements like 'it will take a lot of time'. To reach a higher band, you should provide more detailed explanations and concrete examples to support your claims, ensuring that the logic is fully explored rather than just stated.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organised into clear paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. There is a logical progression from the introduction to the body paragraphs and the conclusion. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical and repetitive. Phrases like 'In the view of some people' and 'On the other hand' are standard but could be varied. Additionally, some transitions between sentences feel slightly abrupt. Improving the flow by using a wider range of linking words and ensuring that referencing (e.g., 'the latter one') is always clear will help improve the overall coherence of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the precision and variety required for a higher band. You rely on basic phrasing such as 'spend large amounts of financial resources' and 'good to be introduced'. There are also some awkward collocations and word choices, such as 'Fastly' (which is not a standard adverb) and 'railway net'. To improve, focus on using more sophisticated vocabulary and idiomatic expressions appropriate for an academic context. Avoid repeating simple words and try to incorporate more precise terminology related to infrastructure and urban planning.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are several grammatical errors that occur throughout the text. For example, 'should spent' should be 'should spend', and 'improve lot of transport' lacks an article ('a lot of'). There are also issues with punctuation and sentence construction, such as the run-on sentence in the conclusion. To achieve a higher score, you need to demonstrate better control over complex structures and reduce the frequency of basic grammatical errors. Proofreading for subject-verb agreement and article usage would be highly beneficial.

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