Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-07

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In recent years, construction of new railway lines has become a subject of intense debate in modern society. In some countries people argue that the new railway lines are necessary to overcome the travel time and the government should invest to construct it, while some people believe that the improvement of existing public transport is more significant. This essay will not only discuss the both views but also purpose suggestions that what is most indispensable.

On the one hand, in modern era advancement is necessary in each and every field of life so the individuals who demanding new railway are want to minimize their commuting time; which will be beneficial for them. Moreover, it also modernize the city' look and enhance it's beauty which also helpful to attract the tourists. Furthermore, money which spends on it's construction can be collected back by selling of tickets so it's not a prodigious issue.

On the other hand, improvement of currently available transport is also essential as the citizens are routinely using it for their daily purposes. Moreover, the people who are fully dependent on public transport are really disappointed by the facilities that are currently available, therefore they are argue that the improvement of existing public transport is more important. Furthermore, it also lessens the difficulties of public who are routine users.

In conclusion, from my perspective firstly the government should invest money on the improvement of currently available transport as it badly effects the routine passengers and later on try to collect funds from all over the world and then utilize it by investing it on the construction of new railway.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear personal opinion in the conclusion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat superficial. For instance, the argument regarding the economic benefits of high-speed rail is limited to 'selling tickets,' which lacks depth. Similarly, the points about public transport are repetitive. To reach a higher band, you should provide more specific examples or elaborate on the long-term socio-economic impacts of both options. The position is clear, but the supporting arguments need more substantial evidence and logical extension to fully satisfy the requirements of the prompt.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into clear paragraphs, and there is a logical progression of ideas. You use basic cohesive devices such as 'On the one hand,' 'Moreover,' and 'Furthermore' to link your points. However, the use of these devices is somewhat mechanical and repetitive. Additionally, some referencing is slightly unclear, such as the phrase 'purpose suggestions that what is most indispensable' in the introduction, which is grammatically awkward and hinders the flow. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring smoother transitions between sentences would enhance the coherence of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the precision and range required for a higher band. You rely on common phrases like 'intense debate' and 'modern society.' There are also some instances of awkward word choice and collocation errors, such as 'the individuals who demanding new railway are want to' and 'prodigious issue' (which is used incorrectly here). To improve, focus on using more precise academic vocabulary and collocations, such as 'infrastructure investment' or 'commuter satisfaction,' rather than relying on general descriptive terms.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede readability. Common issues include subject-verb agreement ('the individuals who demanding... are want to'), incorrect article usage ('the city' look'), and misuse of apostrophes ('it's' used for possessive 'its'). While the meaning is generally clear, these persistent errors in basic grammar and punctuation prevent the essay from reaching a higher band. You should focus on proofreading for subject-verb agreement and the correct use of possessive pronouns versus contractions.

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