Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-18
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
In this modern world of hustle and bustle, some people argues that it is important to utilize finances to construct new railway line. Whlist, other side argues that funds should be spend on existing public transport to make it more better. Although, there is room of advancement in present transport system, however need to expand the railway lines cannot be over seen. This essay will elobrate the importance of new railway lines, along with need of improvements in present transport ways with supporting examples and my point of view.
To begin with, delayed transport and poor quality have become major concern because it incorporates the ideal ideas regarding public transport. Similarly, another key aspect is increase in migration to already developed areas has become a huge issue to existing transport. For instance, almost 30% of people migrated to metropolitan area in melbourne from regional areas while the transport facilities were not able to catch up on this pace.
On the other hand, if railway lines will not be expanded to far areas, this could result in huge migration from regional areas because quality of life is directly propotional to better transport. Better transport and access to all areas are supposed to be considered as the major causes of bringing such alteration. However the biggest challenge in regard to this is finance, which is meant to be supporting idea of this easy.
In a nutshell, despite having a challenge and multiple prespectives from the people, I view there is more need of expanding railway lines to every part of country which will help to overcome major problem of mass migration. Also, I am determined to keep my speculation on improvement in present transport system and yet more changes could be seen in association with transport system.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response addresses both parts of the task by discussing the views on constructing new fast railway lines versus improving existing public transport, and the writer provides a personal opinion in the introduction and conclusion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited and repetitive. For instance, the second paragraph mentions migration and transport problems in Melbourne, but the link between high-speed rail and solving mass migration is underdeveloped and slightly unclear. The conclusion reiterates the writer's stance, but overall, the arguments lack depth and extension. Therefore, this performance aligns closely with Band 5.0, where ideas are somewhat limited and under-developed, and the position is present but not fully expanded.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is divided into four paragraphs, providing a basic structural framework. However, logical progression is frequently disrupted by awkward transitions and confusing sentence connections. For example, phrases like 'Whlist, other side argues' and 'which is meant to be supporting idea of this easy' show faulty or mechanical cohesion. Referencing and referencing pronouns are sometimes unclear, making it hard to follow the exact logical flow between sentences. Paragraphing is attempted, but the internal cohesion within paragraphs lacks smooth signposting. This level of organization and cohesive control corresponds to a Band 5.0, characterized by some overall structure but a lack of clear progression and inaccurate or overused cohesive devices.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is adequate to convey the basic message, but the range is limited and contains numerous noticeable errors in word choice and spelling. Examples include 'argues' instead of 'argue', 'Whlist' instead of 'Whilst', 'elobrate' instead of 'elaborate', and 'propotional' instead of 'proportional'. The writer attempts some less common phrases like 'hustle and bustle' and 'directly propotional', but inaccuracies in collocation and spelling cause some difficulty for the reader. There is also unnecessary repetition of phrases like 'transport system' and 'regional areas'. These features reflect Band 5.0 lexical performance, where noticeable errors may cause some difficulty for the reader.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The student attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but frequent grammatical errors impede readability. Errors include subject-verb agreement issues ('some people argues'), incorrect prepositional usage ('spend on existing public transport to make it more better'), and awkward phrasing ('cannot be over seen'). Punctuation is also problematic in places, such as unnecessary commas splitting clauses incorrectly ('Although, there is room of advancement... however need to expand...'). Complex sentence structures are frequently faulty. Because of the high frequency of grammatical mistakes that sometimes obscure meaning, this performance sits comfortably at a Band 5.0.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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