Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-21

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In this ongoing debate between the people that some people argue that government should do more expenditure on constructing new railways tracks, but others believe that the money should be spent on improning more existing puplic transport. This essay will discuss both the public views.

Firstly, some of the people are argue that government should spent the money more on constructing the new railway line in between the cities because they think that trains are very fast and very convenient some times and make it easier for work and leisure. For example, high speed trains in some countries like japan and china have made long distance jounerys faster and more convienet. They can also reduce the number of people who are travel by plane, which may help to reduce the carbon emissions. However these benefits are mainly felt by people who want to travel within the cities.

On the other hands, some argue tha government should not only spent the money on the railways but they should be sepnding on the existing traveling services like buses, taxis, and subways etc. While these services are overcrowded, unreliable, or old people can lot of time and energy just getting to work or schools. Simple just do some improvments, such as running buses to add some new routes and replacing the subways cars, could make daily travel easier. Since these system are used by so many people, government spending on them would benefits a much larger part of the population.

In conclusion, both high- speed rail and local puplic transportations are important, but I believe that existring transport service should come first because faster trains can be useful for connecting cities, but better buses and subways solve the problem for more daily commuters.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses all parts of the task by discussing both views—spending money on new high-speed rail versus improving existing public transport—and provides a clear personal opinion in the introduction and conclusion. Ideas are extended and supported with relevant examples, such as mentioning high-speed trains in Japan and China, and detailing common improvements like buses and subways. However, there is a tendency to slightly over-generalize and some arguments remain somewhat underdeveloped, particularly in the first body paragraph where the writer mentions that benefits are mainly felt by people travelling within cities, which is slightly contradictory to high-speed rail connecting different cities. Overall, the task is handled adequately, meeting the criteria for a Band 6.0.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay presents a clear overall arrangement with logical paragraphing, separating the introduction, the two body paragraphs discussing opposing views, and the conclusion. Cohesive devices are used to signal transitions, such as 'Firstly', 'However', 'On the other hands', and 'In conclusion'. However, referencing and cohesion are sometimes faulty or mechanical. For instance, the introductory sentence contains a confusing grammatical tangle ('In this ongoing debate between the people that some people argue...'), and 'On the other hands' contains a grammatical error. Paragraphing is used sufficiently, but logical progression within paragraphs occasionally stumbles due to awkward phrasing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully incorporating terms such as 'ongoing debate', 'carbon emissions', 'overcrowded', 'unreliable', and 'commuters'. However, there are numerous word choice errors and awkward collocations throughout the text, such as 'do more expenditure' instead of 'spend more money', 'improning' (a spelling error for improving), 'puplic' (public), and 'travel by plane' instead of 'travel by planes' or 'flying'. Less common vocabulary is attempted with some inaccuracy. While these errors do not impede overall communication, they prevent the lexical score from reaching Band 7.0.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, utilizing relative clauses and conditional structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors in tense usage, article placement, and subject-verb agreement. Examples include 'some of the people are argue that government should spent', 'people can lot of time', and 'Simple just do some improvments'. Additionally, sentence structures occasionally break down under complexity, such as the convoluted opening sentence. While simple sentences are generally controlled, complex structures feature frequent errors that occasionally require the reader to re-read, though they rarely impede overall communication completely.

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