Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-07

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

It is often argued that people in multiple countries believe that it is essential expenditure on new railway lines between different cities for fastest route . While other believe that money should be spent on modification on existing public transport.

In my opinion, I completely agree with this viewpoint expenditure on new railway lines it is far better than modification of existing public transport.

This essay will discuss both point of view to support my instance.

To begin with, the primary reason why I support this view is that if we spend money on new railway lines it fastest the route between cities within a hour we cover 100 miles it is not only shortest the route but also manage the time for workers.

In other words bullet train is quite faster than normal train, people love to travel between different cities . in these tourism also promote.

people admire by travelling without wastage a whole day to travel; one city to another . for instance recent study showed travelling is good therapy for depression and anxiety .

This is mainly because in daily life we are busy at their work hospital or colleges university. several months gone we are unable to plan trip just for longer route and 3rd class public transport, because many people cannot afford business class prime zone domestic tickets, that's why majority people train for their long journey travel route, it is easy to book tickets in desirable train and every city have their own railway stations, if government should spend on new railway tracks its not only beneficial for local citizen but beneficial for government because tourism promoted we cover 38 hours distance in 4 hour.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You state a clear preference for new railway lines, and you give relevant reasons, including faster journeys, time savings for workers and possible benefits to tourism. However, the task asks you to discuss both views, and the response gives almost no explanation of why governments might instead improve existing public transport. The opening mentions that position, but it is not developed or supported. Your own case is also difficult to follow in places: the claims about covering 100 miles within an hour and reducing a 38-hour journey to four hours need clearer context and support. To strengthen the response, explain the benefits of upgrading current services, then compare them with high-speed rail and develop your opinion with precise examples.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

There is an attempt to organise the response, with an opening, a stated opinion and a supporting section introduced by “To begin with.” This gives the reader some sense of direction. However, ideas are not arranged into clear, purposeful paragraphs, and the discussion moves abruptly from journey times to tourism, mental health, work and ticket affordability. Several sentences run together, while full stops and capital letters are used inconsistently, making relationships between points hard to follow. Phrases such as “In other words” and “for instance” signal connections, but the ideas that follow do not always clearly support the preceding claim. Use separate paragraphs for each view and your opinion, and connect each reason to an explanation or example.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some topic-related vocabulary, including “railway lines,” “public transport,” “bullet train,” “tourism” and “desirable train,” so the subject is generally identifiable. There are also attempts to express more specific ideas about travel time and affordability. However, the range is limited and several word choices or combinations are unnatural or unclear, such as “modification on existing public transport,” “fastest route” and “people admire by travelling.” Some expressions, including “3rd class public transport” and “business class prime zone domestic tickets,” make the intended meaning difficult to determine. Aim for accurate transport collocations and avoid adding terms whose meaning is uncertain. More precise vocabulary would help you explain the contrast between new high-speed services and improvements to existing networks.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt a few longer structures, including a conditional beginning “if we spend money on new railway lines” and a reason introduced by “This is mainly because.” These show an effort to connect ideas rather than rely entirely on short statements. However, sentence structures are often incomplete or inaccurately formed, and errors frequently make the meaning difficult to follow. For example, “I completely agree with this viewpoint expenditure on new railway lines it is far better” joins clauses without the necessary grammatical links, while “we cover 100 miles” lacks a clear subject and time reference. There are also problems with articles, agreement and sentence boundaries. Practise building complete sentences with one main clause and a clearly linked supporting clause, then check verb forms, articles and punctuation.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.