Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-09

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In many countries, transportation is an important part of people's live. Some people believe that government should spend large amount of money for build a new railway tracks for fast train services between cities, while some other people thought that the money should be spend to improve present public transit. Which I will be discuss in further paragraphs.

First and foremost, building a new railway lines for high-speed trains has sevral advantages. Firstly, these trains can help people travle between cities faster. For instance, people can save time when travelling work, education or holidays. Secondly, high-speed trains can reduce the number of cars or roads, and many other private vehicles, which may effect our environment, reduce traffic on roads and air pollution. Therefore, investing in modern railway system can be beneficial for environment and the economy.

On the other hand, many people believe that government should improve existing transport, such as buses, local trains and metro services. This is because millions of people use this facilities and they suffer during their travelling with many health issues, such as, back pain, mussles pain. Also, many people use this facilities whenever they travel for their work, school and other places. If government provide more buses, better facilities and regular serives and maintian that machines, so people can travel more and they may help to global environment.

Moreover, improving current transists is less expensive rather than building completely new one.

In conclusion, although high-speed trains offer faster travel between cities, I believe that improving existing public transport should more attention because it is usefull for everyday travellers.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You discuss both proposed approaches and give a clear preference in the conclusion: improving existing public transport should receive more attention because it serves everyday travellers. The points about faster intercity journeys and reduced car use are relevant, as are the references to buses, local trains and metro services. However, several ideas are asserted rather than explained. For example, the claim that current transport causes back and muscle pain needs a clearer link to overcrowding or poor conditions, and the environmental benefit of adding buses is not explained. The comparison that improvements are less expensive is also brief. Develop each main point with a specific explanation or example, and make your position clearer earlier in the response.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, one paragraph for each view, and a conclusion. Sequencing phrases such as “Firstly,” “On the other hand,” and “Moreover” help signal the direction of the discussion. Overall, the reader can follow the main contrast. However, some connections are mechanical or unclear. The opening sentence, “Which I will be discuss in further paragraphs,” is not smoothly connected to the introduction, and the long sentence beginning “If government provide more buses” combines several ideas without clear relationships. References such as “this facilities” are also unclear because the noun is plural. Use transitions selectively and organise each body paragraph around one main claim followed by its explanation and example.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use relevant topic vocabulary, including “high-speed trains,” “public transit,” “air pollution,” and “everyday travellers,” so the subject is generally clear. There are also attempts to use more specific terms such as “maintain” and “investing in modern railway system.” However, the range is limited and several spelling, word-form, and collocation errors make the writing less precise: “travle,” “sevral,” “serives,” and “global environment” are examples. Phrases such as “reduce the number of cars or roads” do not express the intended idea accurately; trains may reduce car use or road traffic, not the number of roads. Build accuracy with transport-related collocations and check spelling and word forms during revision.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including a conditional structure beginning “If government provide more buses” and a contrast introduced by “although.” However, errors occur frequently in sentence construction and often make the reader pause. Examples include “people's live,” “government should spend large amount,” “the money should be spend,” and “I will be discuss.” There are also problems with articles, agreement, and plural forms, as in “a new railway lines” and “this facilities.” The conditional sentence is incomplete or awkwardly joined to “so people can travel more.” Practise accurate subject–verb agreement, verb forms, articles, and sentence boundaries, then proofread each sentence for a clear subject and main verb.

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