Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In many countries,some people believe it is important to invest large amount of budget on building new reailway lines for faster tarnsportation between urban areas , whereas others aruge that the budget should be spent on maintaining and improving public transport rather than speanding huge amount on railways.This essay will discuss both views before I gave my own opinino on why blanced approch have needed.

On the other hand , people argue that government should spend more money on devloping new railways because it can reduce commute time and improve environment .Although , building new railway lines can be expensive , it can make easier and faster to travel in busy cities via fast trains . In additions , it can help to reduce traffic congestion and improve environmental problems such as air and noise pollution .In instance ,in japan and korea there are sevrals fast trains which can transport many peoples at once and reducing traffic problems which could be incrase when people uses private cars.As a result ,it makes cities more peaceful and appeling .

On the other hand , others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport instead of making new railways lines .Goverment should improve traffic congestion and make public transport more confortable , trusted and accessable at lower rates for fair .Money shoulod be spent on maintain traffic problem and environmental problem which can be beneficial for both public and environment.As a result people can commute without any problems with lower rates.

In conculsion , construting new railway lines helps reduce travel time and improve air qaulity while governments also spend money on improving public transport which will make travel affordable and reduce traffic problems .I strongly believs blanced approch should be necessary to achive better solution for traffic congestion and road conditions .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You discuss both proposed approaches and give a clear, if brief, opinion that a “balanced approach” is needed. Relevant benefits are identified: new fast railways may reduce commuting time, congestion and pollution, while improving existing services could make travel more affordable and reliable. The Japan and Korea example also supports the first view. However, the two sides are not developed equally: the case for new railways includes several effects and an example, whereas the existing-transport paragraph mostly lists desired improvements without explaining how these would address current problems. Your conclusion repeats the position but does not specify what a balanced investment would involve. Develop each view with a clear reason and a concrete illustration.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion, and the reader can follow the broad comparison. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes mechanical or unclear. Both body paragraphs begin with “On the other hand,” even though the first presents the first view, so the linking phrase does not accurately signal the relationship. Connectors such as “In additions” and “As a result” are also used formulaically, and some links between claims are difficult to follow. For example, the second body paragraph moves from congestion to affordability without explaining the connection. Use transitions that reflect the actual contrast or consequence, and organise each paragraph around one main claim followed by explanation and support.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt relevant topic vocabulary, including “traffic congestion,” “air and noise pollution,” “commute time” and “public transport,” which helps communicate the subject. However, the range is limited and several spelling and word-choice errors make the writing less clear, such as “reailway,” “tarnsportation,” “trusted” for reliable, and “fair” where fares are intended. Some combinations are also unnatural, including “improve environmental problems” and “spend large amount of budget.” These errors are noticeable and occasionally make the reader pause, which limits precision. Build a bank of accurate transport collocations and check spelling carefully; aim to express each idea with a precise phrase rather than repeating general terms such as “problems” and “money.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a contrast in the opening sentence and a subordinate clause beginning “because.” Meaning is generally recoverable, but control is inconsistent: some complex sentences are faulty, and errors in agreement, articles, verb forms and punctuation recur. For example, “balanced approach have needed” has incorrect agreement and verb construction, while “people uses private cars” does not match the plural subject. The sentence beginning “Although” is also punctuated as a fragment before the next clause. These issues sometimes make relationships between ideas harder to follow. Practise accurate clause boundaries and subject–verb agreement, then proofread articles and verb forms while retaining the variety of sentence structures you are attempting.

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