Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-12

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In a significant number of countries, some individuals believe that it is compulsary to utlize large sums of money on the developing a new railway lines for very quick transport between cities. While others think the money should be spent on improving existing public transport.This essay agrees that money should be used to making new tracks and import trains.

some people believe that money should be spent on constructing new railway line, i think it is important for the save of environment, back in few decades ago trains was run by the coal which produced a large amount of carbon dioxide that damages our ecosystem. Nowadays, most countries moved towards green energy as they instuled a solar panel system and trains are converted into electricity because it saves the world from disaster that caused by the overheat which mostly producd from coal engine. India is a prime example of constructing a new railway tracks and improt hight speed bult trains which covers a long distance in a few hours and cost of transport is very cheaper as compared to the coal trains.

while other argued that money should not spend on the new railway they consider taht it is a waste of money they should reconstructe or improve the older public transport system as it would save the maximum money of our economy. I disagree with thei view point government should adopt the now technology which is benefical for the improvement of transport. the main impact of constructing the new railway would reduce the cost of cargo or parcel as it moved to other energy resources which is cheaper. For instance, if government plans to improve the existing sysmost rem its cost would increase sufficently that could beat the cashflow of the system.

in conclusion, most people like to utlize money on the construction or development of new system as it would be better for the ecosystem. while the other belive that it is not a good idea

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both views and state a preference for building new railway lines, so the response is relevant to the question. The environmental argument and the example of India provide some support, but the explanation is often unclear or insufficiently developed: for example, the link between modern trains, solar energy and preventing environmental damage needs to be explained more precisely. The opposing view is mentioned as a way to save money, but it is not explored in enough detail to show why improving existing transport might be preferable. Your conclusion repeats the preference for new systems but does not fully resolve the comparison. Develop each side with a clear reason and a specific, logically explained example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has a recognisable introduction, separate paragraphs for the two views, and a conclusion, which gives it some overall organisation. However, progression within paragraphs is difficult to follow, and the second body paragraph contains an unclear sentence: “if government plans to improve the existing sysmost rem its cost would increase...” This interrupts the argument. Linking words such as “while,” “nowadays,” and “for instance” are used, but some connections are inaccurate or do not clearly show how one idea follows another. The conclusion also begins with “while” but leaves the contrast unfinished. Use clear topic sentences, arrange each paragraph around one main point, and make references and transitions explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt topic-related vocabulary, including “carbon dioxide,” “ecosystem,” “green energy,” and “cashflow,” and you try to express ideas about transport costs and technology. However, the range is limited by repeated general terms such as “money,” “system,” and “transport,” while frequent spelling errors and inaccurate word choices sometimes make meaning difficult to understand. Examples include “compulsary,” “instuled,” “hight speed bult trains,” and “improment.” Some combinations are also unnatural, such as “save of environment” and “cost of transport is very cheaper.” Build accuracy with common transport collocations and check spelling carefully; precise vocabulary will make your arguments clearer without requiring more complicated words.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including a contrast introduced by “While” and explanations using “because” and “as.” However, complex structures are often faulty, and frequent errors in sentence boundaries, agreement, articles, and verb forms make parts of the response hard to follow. For example, “trains was run” has incorrect agreement and verb form, while “the money should be spent on improving existing public transport.This essay” needs a space and clearer sentence separation. There are also incomplete or poorly formed clauses, particularly in the final paragraph. Practise building accurate sentences first, then combine them with conjunctions. Check subject–verb agreement, singular and plural nouns, articles, and punctuation during revision.

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