Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-12

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Throughout the nation, it is believed by a group of school that it is usefull to splurge hefty amount of money on making new railway lines for commuting between the cities. Whereas, others opine by saying that money should be used in refurbishing the current public transports. Both the perspectives shall be dicussed in this eassy before reaching to a logical conclusion.

To begin with, in metro cities train plays a crucial role in the life of people for commuting to various places. Although excisitng railway lines are doing the job, but it is advisible to the government to spend huge amount of money to develop some train lines for the smooth transit of public from one place to another. Trians are frequently by working people travelling from their house to the respective workplace, suprisingly if the transport gets late an individual might reach late to the office and pays for the consequences. Whereas, developing more railway tracks for faster commuting can sound a lot helpfull for the people in emergency. Moreover, there are several trains who runs at a lot more speed compared to other trains, while having different tracks for therespective trains can sound a lot helfull and time saving at times.

In sharp contrast, spending hefty amount of rupees on just developing new train tracks sounds stupid. Although it is an undenaible fact that railways transport is the most used by public, but the usage of other transports as well cannot be unseen. The state should be spend equally on making better changes in the excisitng public tranports. For instance, rather than developing other train tracks government should focus on improving the sanitisation facility in public vechicles, the longevitiy and comfortable quality of seats to name a few. Even many transport system allocated to public of the nation should have other facilities such as comfortable and clean feeding room for mothers and infants, the public money should we used for improving the excisiting public tranport facilites.

In conclusion, I conclude that though trains are the most used transportation by the society, making changes in the exisiting public transport by investing huge sum of money might be beneficial in the long run as compared to delevoping new railway tracks only.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both views and make your position clear: you recognise the case for faster inter-city rail, but conclude that improving existing public transport is more beneficial. The examples about commuting delays and facilities such as cleaner vehicles and feeding rooms are relevant. However, the arguments are not developed evenly. The benefits of new high-speed lines are described in general terms, and the link between separate tracks and faster services is not fully explained. The second view has more concrete examples, but the essay could explain how these improvements would benefit a wider range of passengers or use public funds more effectively. Develop each main point with a clear explanation and a specific example to make the discussion more convincing.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, one paragraph for each view, and a conclusion that restates your preference. Ideas generally progress within the paragraphs, and signposts such as “To begin with,” “In sharp contrast,” and “In conclusion” help the reader follow the discussion. This organisation is effective, though some linking is mechanical or confusing. For example, “Although existing railway lines are doing the job, but…” combines two contrasting structures, while repeated uses of “Whereas” do not always connect ideas smoothly. Some references, such as “the respective trains,” are unclear. To strengthen cohesion, use a wider range of natural transitions and make the relationship between each example and its main point explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt a range of topic-related vocabulary, including “commuting,” “transit,” “refurbishing,” and “sanitisation facility,” and the reader can generally understand your intended meaning. However, word choice and collocation are often inaccurate or unnatural, which makes the writing less precise. Examples include “a group of school” for a group of people, “splurge hefty amount,” “train tracks” where “railway lines” is more suitable, and “comfortable quality of seats.” There are also frequent spelling errors, including “dicussed,” “excisiting,” and “vechicles.” These issues limit the range and sometimes slow the reader. Focus on accurate transport-related collocations and check spelling carefully; using simpler, natural phrases is better than forcing elaborate wording.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including concessive clauses and longer sentences explaining causes and examples. However, complex structures are often faulty, and errors in agreement, articles, verb forms, and sentence construction recur. For instance, “Although existing railway lines are doing the job, but…” uses incompatible linking patterns; “the state should be spend” has an incorrect verb form; and “several trains who runs” has errors in both the relative pronoun and subject–verb agreement. Some sentences also run together, as in the sentence beginning “Trains are frequently…” and continuing through the consequences of delays. Practise building shorter, accurate sentences first, then add subordinate clauses while checking agreement and verb forms.

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