Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-13

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Nowadays, many countries individuals believe that it is necessary to spend large sums of funds on constructing new railways lines. While other individuals perspective is that funds should be spend on improving existing public transport.This essay will discuss both view before presenting my own opinion.However, I strongly believe that improving existing public transport is crucial for environment overall.

One of the primary reasons why improving existing public transport is crucial because it is often cheaper to improve that save a lot of public funds. For instance roads and bus stations are already constructed, the only need is to improve the the manegment.As a result a lot of time as well as funds are saved.An other main reason is that public transport reduce the the other city trafic. For instance, if individuals use public transport rather than there own private transport consequentely the trafic issue is solved. Further more it can also decrease air pollution and the risk of road accedents.

On the other hand, some individual believe that it is crucial to spend a large sum of fund on constructing new railways lines for fast trains between cities.Because they saw that it is beneficial for those individuals who work in different cities.For instance the individuals who work in different cites they can travel a lot that is very costly and slow as well but traveling by train is very cheap and fast.However i believe that improving existinf public transpoet is more advantageious.

In conclusion, both views have there own merits.However having taken every thing in account, I firmly believe that upgrading or improving the existing transport is more beneficial rather than railways because they can help in decreasing air pollution, reduce the risk of accedents and also save a lot of money and time.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both sides of the discussion and state a clear preference for improving existing public transport, especially in the introduction and conclusion. Your points about saving public funds, reducing traffic and pollution, and making intercity travel faster and cheaper are relevant. However, the two positions are not developed equally: the case for new high-speed rail is supported mainly by one example about workers travelling between cities, with little explanation of wider benefits or limitations. Some claims, such as saying traffic is “solved,” are too absolute. To strengthen the response, explain each view more fully and use specific, qualified examples to support your reasoning.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two views, and a conclusion that restates your position. This makes the overall line of argument easy to follow. You also use signposts such as “For instance,” “On the other hand,” and “In conclusion.” However, some linking is mechanical or unclear: “While other individuals perspective” does not connect smoothly to the preceding sentence, and “However” is used repeatedly without always showing a clear contrast. Several ideas are crowded together in the first body paragraph. Use clearer sentence boundaries and vary transitions, while making the relationship between each example and its main point explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use relevant topic vocabulary, including “public transport,” “air pollution,” “railways,” and “road accidents,” so the reader can understand the subject and your main points. There are also attempts at more specific language, such as “constructing new railway lines” and “private transport.” However, spelling errors and inaccurate word choices are noticeable, including “manegment,” “consequentely,” “existinf,” and “advantageious.” Some phrases are also unnatural or imprecise, such as “travel a lot” and “the other city traffic.” These issues sometimes make the reader pause. Check spelling carefully and build accurate collocations for discussing transport, costs, and environmental effects.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt a mixture of simple sentences and longer structures, including a conditional example beginning “if individuals use public transport” and a contrast introduced by “While.” The overall meaning is generally recoverable, but errors in sentence construction, agreement, articles, and punctuation are frequent enough to affect fluency. For example, “public transport reduce” needs subject–verb agreement, while “it is often cheaper to improve that save” does not form a clear grammatical comparison. Several sentences also run together after full stops, as in “public transport.This essay” and “saved.An other.” Practise building complete sentences and checking agreement, articles, and punctuation before submission.

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