Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-13

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Recently most of the individual of the society satisfy of improving the the public transporting system, while spending a money on constructing the new types of railways line to the countries.

I strongly believe that spending a lot economic for manufacturing the railway lines are refuse to the cities. So mostly people agree with the using of private transport through that enchance the public transport such as car, bike, cycle, bus. If we invest economy to improve the public transport so the people can take the adventage of using that such as commom people of the society they needs are most essentail to the country government.

The leaders of the cities should take a step to improve the public transport while spenting a money on constructing the railway line, which are essentail but common resident are not interested to using the railway line when compare to public transport. Mostly for the women which are go for the market or shopping they can easly use the transport for the short distance or long.Same parents are use this public transport for the childrens dropping the schools or colleges which are affertable and easy to use so the government should improve the public transport.

For the youth of the socity can also use for going the job and it was essentail and quikly reach the distination thats the reason most of the people want the improving the public transport while improving the railway line.

l conclude that it is not necessary for spend large sums of money on new railway lines for fast trains between the cities and i believe that encourage the government to improve the public transport.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You state a clear preference for improving public transport, especially in the opening and conclusion, and you give relevant examples such as travel to work, school, shopping, and the affordability of buses or other local transport. However, the task asks you to discuss both views, and the case for very fast inter-city rail is only briefly acknowledged as “essential”; its benefits are not explained or supported. The reasons for prioritising existing transport are also repeated rather than developed, and some claims—for example, that residents are not interested in railway lines—are too broad. To strengthen the response, explain a specific advantage of high-speed rail, then compare it with a developed reason for improving everyday services and support both with clear examples.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The response has an introduction, several body paragraphs, and a conclusion, and the reader can identify your main position. However, the ideas are not consistently arranged in a clear progression: the second paragraph introduces your opinion, while later paragraphs repeat the preference for public transport without developing distinct points. Connections between ideas are sometimes unclear, particularly in the long paragraph about women, parents, and students. Linking expressions such as “while” and “so” are used repeatedly, but do not always show the precise relationship between claims. Organise the essay around separate purposes—for example, one paragraph explaining the case for high-speed rail and another explaining the case for improving local transport—and use clear topic sentences and references to connect each example to your argument.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You attempt vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “public transport,” “railway lines,” “private transport,” and “affordable,” so the general subject is usually recognisable. However, the range is basic and several inaccurate word choices or collocations make meaning difficult to follow, such as “spending a lot economic,” “manufacturing the railway lines,” and “take the adventage.” There are also repeated references to “public transport” and “improve,” with limited variation. Aim to learn topic-specific combinations as complete phrases, such as “invest in transport infrastructure,” “expand high-speed rail,” and “upgrade existing services.” Check spelling and word forms carefully, and choose terms that distinguish public transport from private vehicles.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt some longer sentences and use clauses with “while,” “which,” and “so,” showing an effort to express relationships between ideas. However, sentence structures are often faulty, and errors in agreement, verb forms, articles, and sentence boundaries frequently make the message hard to interpret. For example, “most of the individual … satisfy of improving” has an unclear subject and verb pattern, while “the leaders … should take a step … while spenting” combines incompatible forms. The sentence beginning “Mostly for the women” is also incomplete, and punctuation is inconsistent. Practise building accurate simple sentences first, then join them with one clear subordinate clause. Check subject–verb agreement and use consistent verb forms when describing people’s needs and actions.

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