Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-16

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

In lots of countries, a portion of society think that big amount of money should be spendt on railway lines however other contradict their point, and belive that the money should be spent on public transport which is existing. I will dicss my points, and will give my option in upcoming paragraphs.

Firstly, money should be spent on railway line because people spend their lots of time to travel one city to another city but if there is a fast railway lines, a person can save their time and use that time in another work. Moreover they can do exercises to keep fit from the time they save. Secondly, while travelling for ;ong hours a person get lazy, and do not do their work with full enery but if there are fast railway lines, a person can save their time, and he or she may more productive.

however, the money which spend on new railway lines, should be spent on existing transport; big portion of society take help of public transport to travel one place to another. If government spend money to improve the public

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You identify both positions: investing in fast new railway lines and improving existing public transport, and you give reasons for faster trains, such as saving travel time and helping passengers be more productive. However, the response addresses the task only partially. The discussion of existing transport stops mid-sentence (“If government spend money to improve the public”), so that view is not explained, and your own opinion is not stated clearly despite the introduction promising one. The examples about exercise and productivity are also asserted rather than supported with a specific explanation or example. The response is 65 words below the required minimum, which leaves too little space to develop both views and reach a clear conclusion. Complete the second argument and state your position explicitly.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is an attempt to organise the response into an introduction and body paragraphs, and signposts such as “Firstly,” “Moreover,” and “Secondly” show how you intend to sequence points. However, the overall progression is incomplete: the final paragraph breaks off after “improve the public,” and there is no conclusion to bring the discussion together. Some linking is mechanical or unclear, particularly “however” at the start of the second paragraph, where the relationship between the opposing views could be expressed more precisely. The first body paragraph also repeats the time-saving idea rather than moving clearly from one distinct reason to another. Use one paragraph for each view, connect each reason to its explanation, and finish with a concise statement of your opinion.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use enough basic topic vocabulary to communicate the main subject, including “railway lines,” “public transport,” “travel,” and “productive.” There are also attempts at more specific expressions, such as “fast railway lines” and “save their time.” However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate or awkward, including “a portion of society,” “big amount of money,” and “take help of public transport.” Spelling errors such as “belive,” “dicss,” and “enery” are noticeable and sometimes slow the reader. Aim for more natural topic phrases, for example “some people,” “a large sum of money,” and “rely on public transport.” Proofreading spelling and choosing familiar collocations accurately will make your meaning clearer.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and longer sentences, including a conditional structure in “if there is a fast railway lines, a person can save their time.” This shows an effort to express cause and effect, but control is inconsistent. Errors in verb forms and agreement occur in phrases such as “society think,” “should be spendt,” and “a person get lazy.” Articles, plurals, and sentence construction also need attention: “a fast railway lines” mixes singular and plural, while “the money which spend on new railway lines” is incomplete as written. Punctuation is uneven, with unnecessary spaces and a semicolon after “for.” Practise building accurate sentences with one main clause and a correctly formed subordinate clause, then check subject–verb agreement and singular/plural forms.

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