Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-27

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In some countries, some people believe ispending large amount of money on constructing new railway lines for faster trains between cities is very important, while others think the money should be spent on improving existing public transportation. Although building of new railways for trains is essential because it reduces carbon emissions from vehicles and it helps movement fast, I am of the opinion that the funds should be channelled into existing transport system because it would help the government in improving other areas that need development.

On the one hand, the people who think that money should be used in constructing new railways believe it would help in reducing gases emitting from vehicles. If more lines for trains are being created, it would eliminate the huge number of cars that are always on the road, which will in turn help in safeguarding the health of the citizens. For example, citizens who are prone to air pollutions or have illness like asthma will be safe to move around freely because there will be lesser cars on the road producing such smoke that is detrimented to their health. Also, movement would be more faster, helping people to get to their destinations faster.

On the other hand, others who believe that the funding should be spent on the improvement of existing public transport because it would help the government in establishing other institutions that need focusing. In a country, there are placing that need funding such as the education, agriculture and health system. With the money remaining from the renovation of previous transport system to make it safe for citizens, it can then be kept into those areas that are lacking. For instance, it can be channeled to school where children from low soco-economic backgrounds cannot afford to pay, or even healthcare.

In conclusion, while people think it is better for huge sums of money to be spent on constructing new railways because it makes movement easy for people, and it helps in the reduction of cars causing carbon emission from the road. I believe that money should be channeled to renovating previous mens of transportation because it helps the government focus on other areas of the country

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You discuss both proposed uses of the money and state a clear preference for improving existing transport, particularly in the introduction and conclusion. The case for new railways is relevant: you connect them with fewer cars, lower emissions and quicker journeys, and the asthma example helps illustrate a possible benefit. The opposing case is less fully explained. You say that upgrading transport would leave money for education, agriculture and healthcare, but do not show how improvements to existing transport would cost less or why this is preferable to building new lines. Your position is therefore clear, but some ideas are more developed than others. To strengthen the response, explain the practical benefits of upgrading current services, such as better reliability or wider access, and support the comparison with a specific example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two views, and a conclusion. The progression from the benefits of new railways to your preferred investment in existing transport is easy to follow, and signposts such as “On the one hand” and “On the other hand” help distinguish the arguments. However, some connections are mechanical or unclear. In the second body paragraph, the link between renovating transport and funding other institutions needs more explanation, while “With the money remaining” leaves the reader unsure how the savings arise. The conclusion also repeats points from the introduction rather than drawing the comparison together, and its final sentence lacks a full stop. Use clearer cause-and-effect links and make each paragraph build the argument rather than simply list benefits.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a relevant range of topic vocabulary, including “carbon emissions,” “public transportation,” “funding,” and “socio-economic backgrounds,” so the main ideas are generally understandable. There are also attempts at more formal phrasing, such as “channelled into” and “safeguarding the health.” However, several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or awkward, including “gases emitting from vehicles,” “lesser cars,” “detrimented to their health,” and “kept into those areas.” Spelling errors such as “soco-economic” and “mens” also reduce precision. These issues do not prevent the reader from following the argument, but they limit the naturalness and control of the vocabulary. Focus on accurate collocations and check spelling; for example, use “vehicle emissions,” “fewer cars,” and “harmful to their health.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt a mixture of simple and complex sentences, including a concession in the opening (“Although building…”) and conditional structures such as “If more lines… are being created.” This gives the response some structural variety, and the main meaning is usually clear. However, errors occur in sentence construction, verb forms, agreement and comparison. For example, “some people believe ispending” has a malformed verb phrase, “movement would be more faster” uses an incorrect comparative, and “there are placing that need funding” has an agreement and sentence-form problem. The conclusion begins with “while” but does not complete the contrast as a full sentence, and the final sentence is missing punctuation. Review verb patterns, comparative forms and complete sentence boundaries, then proofread for these recurring errors.

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