Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In many countries, it is on going debate that govenment should invest in constructing the new high speed railway lines to travelbetween cities or focus on making better the existing public transport. I belive that the upgrading existing transport is more important.

On the one hand, it is very important to construct new railway lines for very fast train because it will have ,many economic benefits. people will choose the fast trains to travel between cities instead of driving their own cars for hours. It will also reduce the air pollution and accident cases. passengers can travel for their offices, business tours and other purposes. Furthermore, an efficient railway track can reduce the dependencies of private cars and domestic flights whic will also lessen the traffic congestion. This will save time and potentially reduce the environmental impact of transportation.

On the other hand, improving existing transport can benefit a large proportion of individuials. In many cities, people experience the overcrowded buses and unreliable transport system. A significant number of Individuals face difficulties in travelling within the city. By improving the transport it will help many of students, office workers and labours because people with low income mostly rely on public transport. Moreover, improving the existing transport is more beneficial than constructing a new railway line which will take many years and financial resources.

In my opinion, government should work on existing transport becaue it will help a large number of people including students, office workers and labours. In conclusion, although high speed railways can improve connections between cities but strenghtening existing transport should get priority because it addresses the immediate need of wider society.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both sides of the discussion and state a consistent preference for improving existing transport, so the response fulfils the main task. The case for high-speed rail is relevant: you link it to fewer car journeys, reduced pollution and congestion, and faster travel. The argument for upgrading current services is also clear, especially the benefits to students, workers and lower-income passengers. However, some points are asserted rather than developed; for example, the economic benefits of new railways are mentioned but not explained, and the claim that improvements help many people could use a specific illustration. Develop each main reason with a clearer explanation or example to make the discussion more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, one paragraph for each view, and a conclusion that restates your position. Signposting such as “On the one hand,” “On the other hand,” and “In my opinion” helps readers follow the argument. Ideas within the paragraphs are generally relevant and logically connected. However, some linking is mechanical, and the first body paragraph moves through several benefits without showing how they relate to the initial claim about economic gains. The conclusion also repeats the position and reasons rather than drawing the discussion together. Use clearer internal links between claims and explanations, and vary transitions so the progression feels less list-like.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a relevant range of transport vocabulary, including “high speed railway lines,” “air pollution,” “traffic congestion,” and “overcrowded buses.” These choices communicate the topic effectively, and phrases such as “a large proportion” show an attempt to use more formal language. However, spelling and word-choice errors are noticeable, including “govenment,” “individuials,” “becaue,” and “strenghtening.” Some collocations are also awkward, such as “making better the existing public transport” and “reduce the dependencies of private cars.” Aim for accurate spelling and more natural combinations, such as “improve existing public transport” and “reduce reliance on private cars,” while continuing to build topic-specific vocabulary.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentences, including a relative clause in “which will take many years and financial resources” and a contrast structure in the conclusion. Most ideas remain understandable, but some grammatical errors recur. For example, “it is on going debate” is missing an article, and “the upgrading existing transport” has an incomplete grammatical pattern. There are also problems with agreement and sentence construction in “it will help many of students” and “although high speed railways can improve connections … but.” Punctuation and capitalisation are inconsistent, particularly where sentences begin with lowercase letters or contain misplaced commas. Review articles, verb patterns, and the structure of concessive clauses, then proofread sentence boundaries.

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