Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-11-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Some people think that if children are allowed to make their own choices about everyday things like food, clothes and entertainment, they will become selfish adults who only care about themselves. However, others believe that it is important for children to make their own decisions about things that affect their own lives. I think both views are right.

On the one hand, if children get everything which they want, they may become selfish. For instance, if a child always prefer junk food instead of healthy food, it can be harmful for their health. If children always watch tv and games by their own will, it will affect their studies. Screen time is very harmful for children;s eyesight. This kind of children always select expensive and branded clothes for them, it led to difficulty for some parents.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You introduce both viewpoints and give a clear personal position—“I think both views are right”—then provide relevant examples about food, screen use and clothing. However, the response develops only the concern that children may become selfish; it does not explain the opposing view that making choices helps children, nor does it reach a reasoned conclusion. The examples are brief and mostly describe possible harms rather than fully explaining how they support the argument. The response is also 127 words, below the required 250 words; the nine words copied from the prompt are not included in that count. To address the task more fully, develop both sides, explain your own position, and support each point with specific reasoning or an example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The opening clearly introduces the issue, and “On the one hand” signals the start of an argument, so the reader can follow the basic direction. The examples are also presented in a generally understandable order. However, the response stops after one body paragraph, leaving the second viewpoint and a conclusion absent; this prevents a complete progression from discussion to judgement. Several sentences begin with “If,” creating a repetitive pattern, and the links between the examples and the claim about selfishness are not always made explicit. Use separate paragraphs for each view and your opinion, and connect examples to their implications with clear referencing and varied transitions.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use enough everyday vocabulary to communicate the topic, including “selfish,” “healthy food,” “screen time,” and “branded clothes.” These choices are relevant and generally understandable. The range is nevertheless limited, with repeated basic wording such as “children,” “always,” “things,” and “harmful.” Some expressions are imprecise or unnatural, for example “watch tv and games” and “select expensive and branded clothes for them,” which make the ideas less fluent. Build a wider set of topic-specific phrases for autonomy, responsibility, parental guidance and consumer choices, and check collocations and spelling conventions. More precise vocabulary would help you explain the benefits of children making decisions as well as the risks.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You form several understandable simple sentences and attempt conditional structures, such as “if children get everything which they want, they may become selfish.” This shows some ability to express cause and effect. However, the range is limited, and errors recur in verb agreement and sentence construction: “a child always prefer” should be “a child always prefers,” while “it led to difficulty” does not match the conditional context and needs a suitable verb form. The sentence about watching television and games is also awkwardly structured, and punctuation is inconsistent, including the semicolon in “children;s eyesight.” Practise accurate subject–verb agreement and build a few varied complex sentences, checking each clause and punctuation mark.

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