Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-11-08

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is widely believed that allowing children to make their own choices on dailylife matters is likely to result in a society of people who are selfish and don't value others emotions. On the other side, some proportion thinks that it is necessary for children to make decisions about issues that affects them. In my opinion, giving them freedom in decision making is very important for the development of independency, which helps them later in their adulthood.

A significant proprtion of society against the allowing children to make their own decision on daily matters such as food, clothes and entertainment. This is because, they thougt it led to selfishness among them. I respect their opinion, but selfishness does niot just come from the independency in decision making. The main reason of selfishness among individuals is no team work during childhood. As a result of this, they only priotize their wishes in adulthood and become selfish.

I support considerably the opinion of other individuals of society. I personaly believe that parents must allow their children to make independent decision about their daily matters. The main reason behind its importance is this practice can develop skill of independent decision making among them. Moreover, If child faces difficult condition in adulthood, there is no guarranty that his or her parents will be there with him or her. Therefore, this independent decision making will help them in future. Especially, the condition come when they have to choose one job among two. Then at that thime, their decision making skill which developed in childhood helps them to choose perfect job for them.

Some locals are on the side of children must have permission to make their own decisions and significant proportion against this opinion. I truly respects both opinions, but on the side of allowing children to make their own choices brcause it helps them later in daily life especially during adulthood.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You discuss both perspectives and state a consistent preference for children making choices, linking this to independence and later adult decisions. The example of choosing between two jobs helps illustrate your view. However, the opposing argument is not fully explained: you report that some people fear selfishness, but the claim that a lack of teamwork causes selfishness is asserted rather than supported. The response also gives limited attention to how children’s choices might affect them or how parents could balance freedom with guidance. The conclusion repeats your position without adding a final insight. Develop each side with a clearer explanation and a specific, relevant example to make the discussion more complete and persuasive.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two views, and a conclusion. Some links, such as “Moreover” and “As a result,” show how you intend ideas to connect. However, progression is weakened by repetition: the final paragraph restates the two sides and your preference rather than drawing the discussion together. Several connections are unclear or mechanical, including “I support considerably the opinion” and the shift from selfishness to teamwork without explaining the relationship. Referencing is also sometimes imprecise, as in “this practice” and “its importance.” Organise each body paragraph around one main claim, explain it in sequence, and use linking phrases only where they clarify the relationship between ideas.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “selfishness,” “independent decision making,” and “adulthood,” and the reader can generally understand your main points. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, which makes parts of the response awkward: “a significant proportion of society against,” “develop skill,” and “choose perfect job.” Spelling errors such as “proprtion,” “thougt,” “guarranty,” and “thime” also reduce accuracy. Aim for natural combinations and accurate forms, for example, “a significant proportion oppose this view” and “develop decision-making skills.” Proofreading for spelling and choosing precise expressions would make your argument clearer and more fluent.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including a conditional structure in “If child faces difficult condition in adulthood…” and a relative clause in “skill…which developed in childhood.” However, complex sentences are often faulty, and errors occur frequently enough to make some passages difficult to follow. Examples include subject–verb agreement in “issues that affects them,” missing articles in “If child” and “choose one job,” and incomplete sentence structure in “A significant proportion of society against…” The final sentence also has agreement errors in “I truly respects.” Practise building complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, and check agreement, articles, and clause structure before submitting.

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