Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-11-08

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is an undeniable fact that allowing children to make their own choices creates society full of independent people. It is often arguable by some people that by permitting children to make own choices will make them individuals, who only thinks about their own wishes. As, they believe that it makes them somewhat selfish. while, other school of thought still claims that children should make decisions about vital matters. This essay will explore both these views before discussing personal opinion

On one hand, there are individuals that consider this statement accurate. They do not want their children to be self aware. They think that, their children will become more self centered. They will not think about others. For example, parents of my childhood buddy was of this nature. They did not let my friend decide anything. However, this behavior ultimately backfired as their child became a person who can not decide anything on his own. This factor clearly expresses one side of the argument.

On the other hand, the advocates of the second view claim that children should be making their own decisions by themselves. They should chose their own everyday useable items. For instance, my parents are also in this line. They let us do our own work and chose anything that we like. Therefore, this given explanation elaborates the other side of the argument.

As far as my opinion is concerned, I am in the same boat as the second opinion holders are in. I Absolutely agree with them. I strongly believe that children of all age should be making their own choices. This enables them to take hard challenges by themselves and be more independent.

In conclusion, although people would have different opinion about the given statement but I favoured the second view because other is not strongly backed with logical reasons.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both views and state a clear preference for children making their own choices, especially in “I am in the same boat as the second opinion holders.” The childhood-friend example also gives some relevant support. However, the discussion is only partially developed: the first view is described mainly as parents fearing selfishness, while the second is supported by a brief account of your own parents without explaining how everyday choices build responsibility or consideration for others. The conclusion says the opposing view is not backed by logical reasons, but the essay has not fully examined its reasoning. To strengthen the response, explain the benefits and risks of each position and connect each example directly to the task.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two views, your opinion, and a conclusion. Signposting such as “On one hand,” “On the other hand,” and “In conclusion” helps readers follow the broad direction. However, progression within paragraphs is limited, and several linking phrases feel formulaic or do not clearly show the relationship between ideas. For example, “This factor clearly expresses one side of the argument” repeats the point rather than advancing it, while “Therefore, this given explanation elaborates the other side” is vague. The opinion paragraph is also brief and could be integrated more clearly with the preceding discussion. Develop a sequence of claim, explanation, and example in each body paragraph, using references that make connections explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “self-centered,” “independent,” “vital matters,” and “backfired,” and the meaning is generally understandable. However, the range is limited and several expressions are awkward or imprecise, which makes the writing sound repetitive or unnatural. Examples include “everyday useable items,” “second opinion holders,” and “take hard challenges.” There are also spelling and word-form errors, such as “chose” where the intended meaning is “choose,” and “self aware” would normally be written as “self-aware.” Aim for precise, natural collocations and avoid relying on stock phrases such as “in the same boat.” More varied language for autonomy, responsibility, and social awareness would help express the argument more clearly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including a contrast structure beginning “although” and clauses introduced by “that.” However, control is inconsistent, and errors sometimes make sentences difficult to follow. For example, “by permitting children to make own choices will make them individuals” has a faulty sentence structure, and “parents of my childhood buddy was” has subject–verb disagreement. Other issues include “children of all age,” missing articles in phrases such as “creates society,” and inconsistent capitalisation and punctuation, including the lower-case “while” after a full stop. Several complex attempts are not securely formed. Practise building accurate sentences around one main clause, then add subordinate clauses, and check agreement, articles, plurals, and sentence boundaries.

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