Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-11-09

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Some individuals have a perspective that children having freedom of personal decisions regarding their dressing sense, eating meals and fun activities will raise the population containing more selfish people in society. In contrast, the others believe that children should be encouraged to have their own choices for things that bother them. I believe that parents should neither control their children life completely nor leave all the matters on them.

If parents give their offsprings all free space and completely allow them to buy anything that they want without considering budget or eat any kind of food they want, and do any type of activity or entertainment then their children will become arrogant, self centered and rudy. These kind of children have never forbidden for anything so they do not have any idea about how to behave when someone will reject their demand or opinion. For example, mostly in rich alete class families children are raised in such a way that their parents provide each and everything and fulfil all unnecessary demands and do not scold them for crying and being demanding everyday. Their children become ruthless and selfish in their adulthood.

Having own choice is very important for personal satisfaction and mental health for example, if parents will not consider their children choice and force their own choices on their young-ones then the mental health of kids will be deteriorated. Parents should be balanced and allow their children for having own choices upto some extent such as allowing children to buy the dress of their favourite colour occasionally but choose according to their budget, sometimes asking children to select some food options in restaurant eat-outs once or twice in a month and watch or play fun games for restricted times.

In conclusion, although personal choice is crucial for mental health and well being of children but their should be proper control and restrictions as well for child's better upbringing.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You address both views and make your own position clear: parents should neither control every choice nor leave all decisions to children. The discussion of unrestricted freedom is supported with examples about spending, food and children reacting to refusal, while the second view explains the importance of choice for satisfaction and mental health. This covers the task well, but the two sides are not developed equally: the claim about children from wealthy families becoming selfish is broad and would benefit from a more specific explanation or a qualified example. Your own balanced position is clear, though explaining how parents can gradually increase responsibility would make it more fully developed.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, a paragraph for each view, and a conclusion. The contrast marker “In contrast” and the concluding “although” help signal the argument, and the ideas generally progress from unrestricted choice to balanced guidance. However, some sentences carry several points at once, particularly the long opening sentence of the first body paragraph, which makes the reasoning harder to follow. The examples in the second body paragraph are also presented as a list rather than being clearly connected to the central point. Use clearer sentence boundaries and more explicit links between each example and the argument; this would make the progression more consistently smooth.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of vocabulary for the topic, including “personal satisfaction,” “mental health,” “self-centered,” “budget,” and “restrictions.” These choices allow you to discuss both independence and parental guidance, and the meaning is generally clear. There are also attempts at more specific expressions, but some are inaccurate or unnatural, such as “the population containing more selfish people,” “things that bother them,” and “rich alete class families.” Spelling and word-form problems, including “rudy” and “offsprings,” further reduce precision. Aim for natural collocations and check spelling: for example, describe children as “becoming more self-centred” and refer to “matters that affect them.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex structures, including conditional sentences (“If parents give their offsprings…”) and a concession in the conclusion (“although personal choice is crucial…”). The main ideas remain understandable, but some grammatical errors recur and occasionally make relationships between ideas less clear. Examples include “their children life” instead of a possessive form, “these kind of children,” and “if parents will not consider,” where the conditional structure needs adjustment. There are also problems with articles, agreement and sentence boundaries, especially in the long sentence beginning “If parents give their offsprings all free space.” Practise accurate conditional patterns and divide long sentences into shorter, controlled clauses.

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