Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-11-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Some people believe that giving children the freedom to mkae their own decisions in daily life can make them selfish and self-centreted. However, others think that children should have the right to make choices about things that effect them. In my opinion, children should be allowed to make their own decisions because it helps them become independent and responsibe.

On the one hand, some people argue that allowing children to make every decision on their own can have negative effect on society. this is because children may have focus on their personal interests and ignore the feeling of others. For example, if children are alwayz allowed to choose their favourite food, clothes and entertainment, they may become demanding and unwilling to accpet others people's opinions. As result, they might find it diffcult to adjust to different situation and recpect others in the future

On the other hand, i believe that following children to make decisions is important for their personal development. It helps them understand their responsibilites and become more confident Furthermore, making their own choices teaches them how to deal with different situation and their decision.

To conclued, although giving children too much freedom may sometimes make them selfish, I believe that allowing them make their own decisions is beneficial.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both views and state a clear opinion: children should make choices because this supports independence and responsibility. The first body paragraph gives a relevant concern—that children may focus on their own interests—and an example involving food, clothes and entertainment. However, the discussion is brief, and the second view is less fully explained: confidence and responsibility are mentioned but not illustrated or developed. The conclusion repeats your position without adding much. The response also contains 211 words, below the required 250, which limits the space available to explain and support your ideas. Develop each side with a specific example and explain how it supports your point.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a coherent overall arrangement: an introduction, one paragraph for each view, and a conclusion. Signposting such as “On the one hand,” “On the other hand,” and “To conclude” helps readers follow the discussion. Some connections are less clear or mechanical, however. In the second body paragraph, “making their own choices teaches them how to deal with different situation and their decision” does not clearly explain the relationship between the ideas. The final paragraph also repeats the introduction rather than drawing the discussion together. Use clearer links between claims and explanations, and ensure each paragraph develops one main point in a logical sequence.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “self-centred,” “personal interests,” “responsibility,” and “personal development.” These choices communicate the main ideas, but the range is limited and several spelling or word-choice errors reduce accuracy, such as “mkae,” “alwayz,” “accpet,” and “recpect.” Some expressions are also imprecise, including “different situation” and “deal with … their decision.” Aim to use a wider range of accurate phrases for explaining consequences and development, and check spelling carefully. More precise wording would help you express the contrast between selfishness and learning to make responsible choices.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You use both simple sentences and some complex forms, including the conditional example beginning “if children are … allowed” and the contrast introduced by “although.” The main message is generally understandable, but there are some errors in sentence structure, agreement, articles and punctuation. For example, “can have negative effect” needs an article, and “children may have focus” has an awkward grammatical pattern. The sentence beginning “Furthermore” runs into the next idea without clear punctuation, while “allowing them make” is missing a grammatical element. Practise accurate clause construction and review articles, verb patterns and sentence boundaries; this will make your ideas easier to follow.

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