Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-11-13

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

It is argued that allowing children to make them do their own decisions daily matters tends to resulting in a society of people who only care about theirselves, whereas, others claim that it is crucial for children to make choices own choices that affects them. Even this might lead to more selfish society, I believe that independent individuals will create better society as they got used to carrying themselves, not by anyone, from their early life.

It is claimed that the habit from early life is the hardest to change or stop. Likewise, approving children to decide everything about themselves on their own will perhaps plant a principle to think about themselves at first rather than other, which might be unchangable. For example, in Japan, citizens do not eventually care about others' businesses, thus, they prefer to not to distract others and take care of only themselves. But, I partially disagree with this method to grow childrens as they need to be capable of helping others by having less problems in their life.

It is significant to make them do their own decisions to prepare them for the life in order to make them capable of helping others freely. They will somehow face those problems once they grow up, therefore, making them familiar with these troubles from their young age will make their life more convenient which they will be more experienced with dealing issues. For instance, in US, students who prepare their own meal and choose their own clothes are tend to perform better and become more successful than students whose decisions are made by their parents after 10 years post-graduation.

In conclusion, although it is important to teach children to be kind and helping each other, what is more important is that teaching them how to deal with their daily problems in order to make them capable of helping each other by letting them make their daily decisions since their early ages. So, I agree with that is it important for children to make their daily choices on their own.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You discuss both perspectives and state a consistent preference for children making everyday decisions, especially in the introduction and conclusion. The point that early independence can prepare children to handle adult responsibilities is relevant, and the examples about Japan and the US show an effort to support your reasoning. However, the opposing view is less fully explained: you suggest that children may become self-centred, but do not explore how unrestricted choices might affect consideration for others. The examples are also broad and their connection to the claims is not always clear. To strengthen the response, explain the limits of children’s choices and develop each example with a clearer link to your argument, while making your position on balancing independence and consideration for others more precise.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two views, and a conclusion that restates your position. Linking expressions such as “Likewise,” “For example,” and “In conclusion” help signal the stages of the argument. However, some connections are difficult to follow or feel mechanical. For instance, “But, I partially disagree with this method” does not clearly identify which aspect you reject, and the shift from children’s independence to helping others needs a more explicit explanation. Referencing is also occasionally unclear, as in “these troubles.” Improve progression by giving each paragraph one central claim, then showing how its explanation and example support that claim; use linking phrases only where they express a clear relationship.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You attempt a range of vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “independent individuals,” “crucial,” “capable,” and “experienced,” and the main ideas are generally understandable. There are also attempts to use less common expressions, but several choices or collocations are inaccurate or unnatural, such as “make them do their own decisions,” “care about theirselves,” “approving children to decide,” and “take care of only themselves.” Some word forms and spelling also need attention, including “unchangable” and “childrens.” These issues make parts of the argument less precise, even when the intended meaning can be inferred. Build accuracy by learning common word partnerships for decision-making and responsibility, and check word forms and spelling during revision.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You use both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a contrast in the opening sentence and clauses introduced by “although” and “therefore.” This gives the response some structural variety, and the overall meaning is usually recoverable. However, some errors in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence construction remain. For example, “choices … that affects them” has a subject–verb agreement problem, while “students … are tend to perform” uses an incorrect verb pattern. The final sentence, “I agree with that is it important,” is also not grammatically well formed. Work on checking the subject and verb in each clause, and practise accurate patterns such as “agree that…” and “tend to…” while retaining your attempts at complex sentences.

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