Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-11-13

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

A few individuals argue that permitting children to choose clothes and entertainment by themself result into self centered society while others believe that it is essential for children to make decisions about these things because they affect their daily life. Personally, I believe that selecting of food and entertainment options according to their interest make a child more independent and confident. This essay will examine the both perspectives along with examples in the subsequent paragraph.

To commence with the first viewpion which discord with statement that children should be free to make their own choices on daily matters because this will make them more selfish and they always think about their own desires. For examples, if child is free to decide food then he can make wrong choice because they do not have enough understanding about diet and nutrition level. As a result they will suffer from many health issues and nutrition deficiency due to following wrong diet. Moreover, adolecents are not mature enough to make decisions about entertainment because there are many adult websities and channels which can have negative impact on their minds and foster them to commit crime.

On the other hand,some critics think that childeren should be free to make some decision related to their daily life because it increase their confidence and make them more confident. While there are many drawbacks of permitting adolescents to make their own choices such as food and entertainment. However, in some situation child is permitted to choose food according to their interest and wish. Apart from this, this will make them more responsible and learn how to make right choices. For instance, if parents force the child to eat healthy food then he will not follow the parent's instruction. Consequently, they wish to eat unhealthy food that can have negative impact on their health.

In conclusio

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You address both views and state a personal position: you argue that children’s choices can build independence and confidence, while also noting risks around nutrition and unsuitable entertainment. These points are relevant, but the discussion is only partially developed. The first view is presented mainly as a claim that children may choose unhealthy food or encounter adult content; the link between everyday choices and becoming self-centred is not explained in depth. Your support for the second view is also mixed: you mention responsibility, but the example about parents forcing healthy food shifts toward the risks of restricting choice. The conclusion is incomplete, so your final position is not brought together clearly. Develop each side with a direct explanation and a more focused example, then finish with a complete conclusion.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has an introduction and separate paragraphs for the two views, and signposts such as “On the other hand” help readers recognise the change in perspective. However, progression within paragraphs is uneven, and some links are repetitive or unclear. In the second body paragraph, “While there are many drawbacks…” followed by “However” creates a confusing contrast, while the discussion moves from confidence to parental pressure without a clear connection. The opening also promises examples “in the subsequent paragraph,” although the essay uses several paragraphs. The final line, “In conclusio,” leaves the ending unfinished and prevents the essay from feeling complete. Use one clear controlling idea per paragraph, connect each example explicitly to that idea, and provide a complete conclusion.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a range of topic-related vocabulary, including “self centered,” “nutrition deficiency,” “adult websites,” “negative impact,” and “responsible,” which allows you to discuss the main issues. There are also noticeable spelling, word-form, and collocation problems that sometimes make the wording awkward, such as “viewpion,” “discord with statement,” “websities,” and “make some decision.” Repetition of “confident” and “choices” also limits variety. These errors do not prevent the reader from understanding the main argument, but they reduce precision and naturalness. Check spelling carefully and learn common combinations such as “make decisions,” “a balanced diet,” and “have an impact on.” Aim to vary repeated words only when the alternative fits the meaning.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including conditional and cause-and-effect structures: “if child is free to decide food then he can make wrong choice” and “Consequently, they wish to eat unhealthy food.” However, complex sentences are often faulty, and frequent errors in articles, agreement, plurals, and verb forms can make reading difficult. For example, “permitting children … result” needs subject–verb agreement, while “it increase their confidence” needs an appropriate verb form. Articles are also missing in phrases such as “if child” and “make wrong choice.” The final fragment, “In conclusio,” is incomplete. Practise checking each sentence for a clear subject and verb, correct agreement, and necessary articles; then proofread punctuation and sentence endings.

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