Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-07-26

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

At present, a number of individuals consider that if parents are give permission to there children to make their own decision on various matter then this fact can make them selfish and they don't like to think others matter. However, others individuals believe that parents have to incourage their children to make their own opinion.

Every topic is subject to be evaluated from multiple perspective and therefore. The fact in and question has its both proponents and opponents. I will draw my view point regarding this topic to produce logican finding.

There are many reason for people to give opposite decisions about childrens own decision. If people provide enough freedom to their children than children may prioritize only their own dresses and ignore other needs and opinion. In addition, too much freedom can reduce parentes infulence and make children less likely to follow their rules. More specifically, children have lack experience, so they may choose unhealthy food and quality less products.

In conclusion, according to others individuals opinion, make children to take their own decision can bring many advantages for their future life. To begin with, if parents show respect for their children own dicission than it will help them to understand the right and wrong things. Making everyday choices helps children become self-relianat and confident decision. Furthermore, giving children some freedom allows them to express their personality and interest.

In my opinior, another key aspect is recognizing a potential implication of the aforesaid issue in this modern world. This topic can bring both advantage and disadvantage. One of the most advantage is children can become more confident to take their future decision and one of the most disadvantage is they can take any wrong decision because they are not enough experienced.

Moreover, addressing the question and concerns raised by this topic requires taking appropriate steps and measures.

In conclusion, from my own observation, the significance of this topic is a widely discussed and one of the most debatable issue in today's contemporary world. It is important to consider both opportunities and limitation when discussing this fact.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a personal opinion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat superficial. For instance, the argument regarding children becoming selfish is mentioned but not deeply explored. The structure is slightly confusing, as the essay contains two separate 'In conclusion' paragraphs, which disrupts the logical flow of the argument. While the prompt is addressed, the ideas lack the depth and extension required for a higher band score. The position is clear, but the overall essay structure is repetitive and lacks a cohesive progression of thought.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is divided into paragraphs, but the logical progression is hindered by poor paragraph management. The inclusion of two separate 'In conclusion' sections is a significant issue that confuses the reader. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'To begin with' and 'Furthermore', but they are sometimes used mechanically or incorrectly, such as the sentence fragment 'Every topic is subject to be evaluated from multiple perspective and therefore.' Referencing is occasionally unclear, and the overall structure feels disjointed rather than a unified argument.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks precision and variety. There are frequent errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'quality less products' instead of 'low-quality products' and 'incourage' (spelling). The student relies on basic vocabulary and struggles to express more complex ideas accurately. While the meaning is generally conveyed, the lack of control over word forms and collocations limits the score. More sophisticated vocabulary is needed to move beyond a basic level of communication.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a high frequency of grammatical errors, including subject-verb agreement ('parents are give permission'), article usage, and sentence structure. Many sentences are awkward or contain fragments, such as 'The fact in and question has its both proponents and opponents.' While there is an attempt to use complex sentences, they are often marred by errors that occasionally impede clarity. Punctuation is also inconsistent. The range of structures is limited, and the frequent errors in basic grammar prevent the essay from reaching a higher band.

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