Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-07-27
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
In recent times,many individuals think that youngsters must have their opinion on dailylife activities like in food,clothes,entertainment and also in education.This leads to that they only think about own wishes and avoid about society wishes.Whereas, some people believe that is very crucial for youth to make right decisions about any information which influence them in their life.In my perspective, by giving full of freedom to their choice helps to develop their personal growth.In contrast, they should take right decision which impact in their life.It encourages to shape thier life in good way with good decision.
Firstly,the chidren with full of choice towards their life in different aspects like food,clothes and entertainment.This helps to shape their life in good manner.For example,if they have choice to go to gym.This leads to motivate them to eat proper diet food which helps to stay healthy in their life.In addition, they also manage their customes according to their activities.But.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, reaching only 154 words. This significantly impacts the development of ideas. While the essay attempts to address both sides of the argument and provides a personal opinion, the discussion is underdeveloped and fragmented. The ideas are presented in a list-like fashion without sufficient elaboration or logical extension. The conclusion is missing, and the argument remains incomplete. To improve, you must expand on your points with specific examples and ensure a balanced, fully developed discussion that meets the length requirement.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay shows some attempt at logical organization, using basic transition signals like 'Firstly' and 'In addition'. However, the flow is frequently interrupted by incomplete sentences and disjointed thoughts, such as the abrupt ending at 'But.'. Paragraphing is present but ineffective due to the lack of content. The use of cohesive devices is mechanical and sometimes inaccurate. To achieve a higher score, you need to ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence, supporting details, and a logical conclusion, while using a wider variety of linking words to connect ideas more fluidly.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is limited and repetitive, relying on basic terms like 'good way', 'good manner', and 'right decisions'. There are several instances of awkward phrasing and word choice errors, such as 'manage their customes' (likely meaning 'choose their clothes') and 'dailylife activities'. The range is insufficient to express complex ideas with precision. To improve, focus on learning collocations and more academic vocabulary related to child development and autonomy. Avoid repeating the same simple adjectives and try to incorporate more precise terminology to convey your arguments effectively.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay contains frequent grammatical errors, including missing articles ('in food, clothes'), incorrect preposition usage, and sentence fragments. The structure is largely limited to simple sentences, and attempts at more complex structures are often faulty, such as 'This leads to that they only think about own wishes'. Punctuation is also inconsistent, with missing spaces after commas and periods. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, subject-verb agreement, and the correct use of articles. Proofreading for punctuation and basic syntax errors will also help improve your accuracy.
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